More of the same

[uncomfortable man]

I work at a grocery store and when I'm working the cash register I can see how apprehensive people are to enter my line. Sometimes young women will actively avoid my line because they're so above being temporarily associated with a bald checker, jeez. Today, I saw a young woman waiting in line so I called out to her "open reg on 5" and she pretended not to hear me. Even worse when I have a woman in my line and after I greet her she doesn't say anything back to me at all. Doesn't even look at me, instead burrying her head in her phone the whole time to avoid any kind of interaction with me. The nerve of some people to deny someone even just the simple common courtesy of saying "hello", because I'm bald. I have to just sit there and take it acting friendly to these disrespectful douche bags. I want to shake these fvckers and slap them accross the face and give them a piece of my mind. Everyday I dread having to face the public and deal with their ****. Such a heavy weight on my heart. I don't know how much longer I can tolerate this living hell. It's getting too much to take.

 

[CaptainForehead]

An alternative explanation might be that women and just rude and lazy:
The first woman might just have been lazy to move over to your line.
The not saying hello: I'm pretty sure it happens to 90% of the guys.
Remember: 90% of the guys are invisible to women. You are ascribing your present invisibility to your baldness probably because you were in the privileged 10% of guys with model looks before you went bald; but a man being invisible to women is actually the norm. Hair or no hair.

 

[uncomfortable man]

Perhaps I have frog prince syndrome. A once handsome young man cursed to be seen as a vile creature the rest of his life. No storybook ending here folks.

 

[JZA70]

The first woman might just have been lazy to move over to your line.
The not saying hello: I'm pretty sure it happens to 90% of the guys.

What a bunch of delusional bullsh1t. Who are you fooling ? It's quite clear that this happened because he was bald. Maybe that girl didn't respond to my text because her phone was dead, maybe that girl didn't want to talk to me because she didn't get a good night sleep. LOL. Come on man, women avoid baldies like the plague.

Slap a full head of hair on him and this would've never happened. It's funny, I saw a young good looking girl ask a baldcel for directions downtown earlier this week, I got a kick out of it because she was trying to listen to him but at the same time she was trying to keep her distance. It was quite ironic.

 

[CaptainForehead]

You're not seen as vile. You are ..just..not..seen. You are now part of the background.

- - - Updated - - -

? It's quite clear that this happened because he was bald.

No, it is not.

 

[uncomfortable man]

An alternative explanation might be that women and just rude and lazy:

The not saying hello: I'm pretty sure it happens to 90% of the guys.

Then statistically speaking these same women would show no signs of life for every male checker but one, which is not the case as I've observed.
And I'm not part of the background, that is the problem. As a bald man amongst a sea of hair I stick out like a sore thumb, which makes me an easy target like some odd spectacle. People react to this. I can see it because it's obvious. That and I just have a knack for reading people... body language, facial expressions and inflections in the tones of their voice. Trust me, I can tell if someone is turned off by my appearance (man or woman, old or young). What I have is worse than being invisible because if I were then they wouldn't be recoiling in horror at the site of my appearance. Mr. forehead, I think you are trying to diffuse an uncomfortable truth, to what end I don't know.

 

[mr the hairy monkey]

captainforehead might be right about it , for maybe half of the time , maybe less.

it's a grocery goddammit not a meetic website , if women go to a grocery with the only intention to dredge people that's a disaster.

I don't know how it is in a woman's head , but your baldness might not discourage people to be courteous towards you , especially when you greet them and that you smile.

if they do not answer back , just tell yourself that you are worth better than these discourteous jackasses.

let's call a spade a spade , if someone does this to you , that proves that he isn't worth it to be dated with (if that's what you want) , considering his poor mentality.

I mean , if this can sadly be done to a bald man , then how would that make people behave toward trisomic people ? or people who have facial diseases or injuries like acid burns ?

 

[JZA70]

it's a grocery goddammit not a meetic website

Just goes to show you that bald men get treated like sh1t no matter where they are.

 

[wrwr]

Come on, it's your imagination!

Who cares about the appearance of cashier in grocery shop?
You have to be really ugly to make people avoid you in such sutiuations. Such grade of ugliness cannot be achieved with hairloss only.

Maybe you have aggressive thoughts, and other people feel it. It reflects in your eyes expression somehow.

 

[DoctorHouse]

UCM, I see this really obese bald cashier at a place I shop and he engages with everyone on a fun level and is treated totally normal. All the women have no problem going into his line or talking to him. And you talk about body language and facial expressions. I am sure people may read yours negatively as you do tend to have a negative attitude toward society for making you feel like the elephant man. They may honestly be "creeped" out by your appearance. I wish you can somehow get some video on this and show us it. I really think maybe with your look and the fact that you are tall, people are actually intimated by you because you look very authoritative.

When I am working and dealing with "odd", non educated people with poor hygiene my body language changes very easily. I don't smile and look serious and people make comments about it to me or my coworkers. People have to rely on your body language if they don't know you before they trust you. If you give off bad vibes even if its unintentional they will avoid you or may even say something negative about you. You generally seem miserable due to your situation and I think people can sense that as they do with me who has a full head of hair. The town where I work could make 10 seasons of Jerry Springer. I just can't believe these people live this way and when I go to work my attitude is negative as I only want to deal with educated people who take care of themselves very well. Many times people I deal with can sense this and they will read me in a negative light. I am sure you have experienced a similar situation.

My dad has been bald and fat his whole life and he has always been treated nicely by everyone he meets. That is because he is very positively engaging with people. He does not understand why I am not like that. I think when you are unhappy with yourself, you tend to be that way. And I really think people sense it.

 

[JZA70]

UCM, I see this really obese bald cashier at a place I shop and he engages with everyone on a fun level and is treated totally normal.

The cashier is probably comfortable in his own skin where as UCM hates every minute of his life. I'm sure he sends off a negative vibe but who doesn't ? Ever since my hair started to go I've become a mentally ill person who hates everyone.

The difference between the fat bald cashier and UCM is the ice cream eater accepted his fate where UCM and most of us will never accept our fate as bald men. I never stop thinking about what my life would have been like if it wasn't for this curse. It could've been a good life. :shakehead:

 

[2bald2young]

The cashier is probably comfortable in his own skin where as UCM hates every minute of his life. I'm sure he sends off a negative vibe but who doesn't ? Ever since my hair started to go I've become a mentally ill person who hates everyone.

The difference between the fat bald cashier and UCM is the ice cream eater accepted his fate where UCM and most of us will never accept our fate as bald men. I never stop thinking about what my life would have been like if it wasn't for this curse. It could've been a good life. :shakehead:

yes, yes it could have been a great life...

 

[DoctorHouse]

The cashier is probably comfortable in his own skin where as UCM hates every minute of his life. I'm sure he sends off a negative vibe but who doesn't ? Ever since my hair started to go I've become a mentally ill person who hates everyone.

The difference between the fat bald cashier and UCM is the ice cream eater accepted his fate where UCM and most of us will never accept our fate as bald men. I never stop thinking about what my life would have been like if it wasn't for this curse. It could've been a good life. :shakehead:

Unfortunately, if you want to have a good life you can't focus on YOURSELF. You have to focus on people who can inspire you and help you achieve the best things in life. My life could have been good if I had perfect genetics. It did not happen so now I become miserable the moment I focus on all my flaws. Not a great way to live. Trust me. I took a potentially great life and threw it away because I focused on myself. That is what is happening to a lot of you guys in this forum. We let our insecurities rule our lives because society taught us this. Yet in 20 years from now if you don't live your life to the fullest now, you are going to be in worse shape than you are now regretting how baldness ruined the best time of your life. As long as you are fine with this, then I would continue to focus on You and your hair counts.

 

[bald29]

Perhaps I have frog prince syndrome. A once handsome young man cursed to be seen as a vile creature the rest of his life. No storybook ending here folks.

I have that too. 3 years ago handsome and with plenty of attractive girls to choose from, very active in the dating scene. Today, lonely, even though for 1 year I tried really hard to date but I finally understood that it's not gonna happen as a NW5 at this young age. So I'm just focusing on my career now, waiting for a cure or a miraculous response to medication.

However, I think that the cashier thing might be in your imagination. Women also don't want anything with me, but nobody ever denied me a smile when I smiled first. People are usually friendly with you when you are also friendly. Like someone above said, you would have to be way too ugly for people to avoid you because of your looks, maybe have your face deformed or something like that.

 

[JZA70]

maybe have your face deformed or something like that.

AKA balding. Disfiguring men since the beginning of time.

 

[mr the hairy monkey]

you would have to be way too ugly for people to avoid you because of your looks, maybe have your face deformed or something like that.

not always true , some people would do the opposite just out of pity or maybe because they don't care about one's condition.

I am among those who'll do so , that would give more comfort to the person and would let him know that his condition isn't the end of the world.

Same with the most miserable charity case , it's just being nice to people whom life didn't smile at , nobody is asking you to have sex with them.

 

[bald29]

not always true , some people would do the opposite just out of pity or maybe because they don't care about one's condition.

I am among those who'll do so , that would give more comfort to the person and would let him know that his condition isn't the end of the world.

Same with the most miserable charity case , it's just being nice to people whom life didn't smile at , nobody is asking you to have sex with them.

Agree, but the thing is that people don't see baldness as a condition that puts you in a misery. Only bald people know that. The 'only' problem with baldness is that decent looking women just don't consider you dating material, that is all there is. Yes, of course this sucks for all bald guys and it does make your life miserable, but it won't stop people from smiling at you or treating you nicely, as long as you do the same.

 

[uncomfortable man]

UCM, I see this really obese bald cashier at a place I shop and he engages with everyone on a fun level and is treated totally normal. All the women have no problem going into his line or talking to him. And you talk about body language and facial expressions. I am sure people may read yours negatively as you do tend to have a negative attitude toward society for making you feel like the elephant man. They may honestly be "creeped" out by your appearance. I wish you can somehow get some video on this and show us it. I really think maybe with your look and the fact that you are tall, people are actually intimated by you because you look very authoritative.

When I am working and dealing with "odd", non educated people with poor hygiene my body language changes very easily. I don't smile and look serious and people make comments about it to me or my coworkers. People have to rely on your body language if they don't know you before they trust you. If you give off bad vibes even if its unintentional they will avoid you or may even say something negative about you. You generally seem miserable due to your situation and I think people can sense that as they do with me who has a full head of hair. The town where I work could make 10 seasons of Jerry Springer. I just can't believe these people live this way and when I go to work my attitude is negative as I only want to deal with educated people who take care of themselves very well. Many times people I deal with can sense this and they will read me in a negative light. I am sure you have experienced a similar situation.

My dad has been bald and fat his whole life and he has always been treated nicely by everyone he meets. That is because he is very positively engaging with people. He does not understand why I am not like that. I think when you are unhappy with yourself, you tend to be that way. And I really think people sense it.

To be fair, some of us have more obvious flaws than others. As insightful as you are, I wonder how your life and attitude would change if you were bald. Why do you feel the need to attribute these problems to everything but the actual baldness itself? Why can't you see that people are just reacting to the baldness at face value? How am I to blame for this? The issue is with the prejudiced baldists, not me.

 

[DoctorHouse]

UCM,if I was bald at a young age I would have done something about it. I would have had a hair transplant or wore a toupee. I am sure I would have been devastated but some how I would have found a way to deal with it. The fact that my father never experienced anything like you do makes me think there is more to you than just your bald head. I have a cousin who went bald early and married a very beautiful lady who is a very nice person. I guess I have never seen or experienced anything you have experienced and I have been around plenty of bald people. Even when I was growing up, I never treated anyone bald differently. I don't doubt your experiences so don't get defensive. The irony of the situation is most guys on here think they will never be able to meet a woman and have children due to their baldness. Yet you have a daughter and a wife and still seem miserable.

 

[Deadman1]

UCM, you can't really blame the customers. This is simply nature and a natural reaction. I am bald too, but I am still disgusted by the sight of bald guys. I sympathize with them but my brain is hardwired to not like how they look. Hating bald people is not a choice. It is built into the brain.