People are assholes

[brent20]

Hey guys i just need to rant and i thought u guys would find this interesting. Last night me and a bunch of my friends were hangin out and one of my buddies has male pattern baldness as well and his might be a little worse than mine, but anyway he has a gf of 4 years now and they are probably gonna get married. Well, my buddy with the male pattern baldness is kind of an *** sometimes but he's still a nice guy, but anyway he left a little early and right after he left one of my buddies was like "I feel bad for Jen (my friends gf)" and were all like why? and he said "Jen is a pretty girl (which she is) and he's gonna be bald in 2 years haha" Now i don't know if my friend didn't care that i was there or doesn't realize it but i highly doubt that because its very noticeable so obviously his comment hit me indirectly and really pissed me off. Why is she unlucky because he is going bald? he's the same person, i couldn't believe he said that, and of course my friend who said it has a perfect head of hair. People are assholes even ur friends, right after he said it no body said anything to add to it, but it still pissed me off.

 

[bubka]

kind of a shitty thing to say, especially from a "friend" he must be jealous of his girlfriend in my opinion, or some other grudge

 

[TheGlamorous]

It was probably rhetoric but still shitty.

Today at work I got hair comments.

First was from a lady in deli that said I look "different" with my hair up. One of my best friends defended that with "It looks alright."

A few hours later a friends dad and mum came in, and her dad is slightly balding, he pushes his hair back and he was like "Ah, you've been inspired by me, slicked back." And at first I was like damnit, but then he said "But your younger then me, so it looks better."

So no. I haven't had any YOUR BALD comments, but I think people are noticing my hair looks a little wonky. Which is fine, because i've always had stupid hair, whether it was thick back then or not

 

[Guest]

Certain people try anything to bring someone down, that's a fact. They always make that kind of comments about anything, not just hair. If you were fat, you'd get fat jokes like that thrown in your face. "How can they have sex? He's so fat!" etc. Luckily not all people are like that.

 

[Guest]

Maybe you should choose your "friends" more carefully......

 

[Nathaniel]

You call that a friend?

 

[Stabber]

agreed, sounds like an insecure shallow a**h**

 

[hawks05]

my guess is that guy is the type of guy who stands on the wall at bars and can't get women attracted to him

 

[Guest]

he is just an a**h**.

 

[Follically Challenged]

I'd feel sorry for her too. No offense but bald is not beautiful, and I feel so much less self-worth even having a minor amount of hairloss going on. I have friends who are losing their hair and it pisses me off because they won't do anything about it. They care about it, but won't even try all natural stuff. Mind you they are poor but they could make the money somehow.

Answer me this, if his girlfriend had been losing his hair, and he left, and your friend said he felt sorry for the guy, would you think he was an ***? I bet not. It's a total double standard when it comes to male and female hair loss. I bet you wouldn't date a balding woman. So if he wants to dis your buddy because he's balding that's fine as far as I am concerned, especially if your friend isn't doing anything about his hair loss. It's easier to be sympathetic towards someone who is at least trying, just like anything with appearance. If he was slowly getting fatter and fatter and kept going through the drive-thru at McDonald's would his comments be appropriate if your friend said he was going to be obese in a couple of years?

 

[Captain Obvious]

^^^That is the talk of an extremely vain and insecure man. To me it sounds more as if your friends are way ahead of you as far as coming to terms with their hair.

I've been called out on my hairline a few times by some thick haired people and I find that putting my hair loss on the table for discussion makes things a whole lot less intimidating, especially in a group situation. Especially when I bombard them with facts of DHT and genetics as well as my feelings towards the issue. This will A. Bore them into not caring anymore or B. possibly open their vain eyes up to my reality. I fully know I'm balding, I know more than you do, and if you want to start an insult fight then we just go tmy biggest insecurity out of they way... let's start in on yours... o hehehe.

 

[Trash]

Feeling sorry for a woman who is together with a balding man is so much bullshit that it hurts.....
thats for a balding man whos a descent person and has other qualities.. and is not an a**h**

 

[Guest]

I'd feel sorry for her too. No offense but bald is not beautiful, and I feel so much less self-worth even having a minor amount of hairloss going on. I have friends who are losing their hair and it pisses me off because they won't do anything about it. They care about it, but won't even try all natural stuff. Mind you they are poor but they could make the money somehow.

Answer me this, if his girlfriend had been losing his hair, and he left, and your friend said he felt sorry for the guy, would you think he was an ***? I bet not. It's a total double standard when it comes to male and female hair loss. I bet you wouldn't date a balding woman. So if he wants to dis your buddy because he's balding that's fine as far as I am concerned, especially if your friend isn't doing anything about his hair loss. It's easier to be sympathetic towards someone who is at least trying, just like anything with appearance. If he was slowly getting fatter and fatter and kept going through the drive-thru at McDonald's would his comments be appropriate if your friend said he was going to be obese in a couple of years?

You're so dead wrong, once again. Female and male hair loss are in no way comparable, for men it's much more common and acceptable, and women don't go completely bald the "natural" way (if they have alopecia areata, that's different). And men shouldn't even be caring about their looks as much as women do (I know, that's changing but still). Besides, bald men often look masculine, and that's fine, but it's usually very unacceptable for a woman to look masculine. The eating thing is also different, it's much easier to lose weight than to stop balding. Much, much f*****g easier.

I'm sure you already knew everything I said and you were just writing stupid stuff for the f*** of it.

 

[tchehov]

Female and male hair loss are in no way comparable, for men it's much more common and acceptable

Male and female hair loss are comparable. Female loss is less common but just as devastating to the sufferer. And why should male hair loss be more acceptable - because it's more common? I don't think so - we are all individuals and therefore respond according to our capacity for pain. The fact that male hair loss has been around for generations does not diminish the pain I feel.

And men shouldn't even be caring about their looks as much as women do (I know, that's changing but still).

Why shouldn't men care about their physical form - it's my representation to the world. In this increasingly shallow society it's our first point of contact and what we are initially judged on. And if it doesn't matter why do all these guys spend hours in the gym? Why did you shave your head? Because you care about your physical appearance. And rightly so...

 

[Follically Challenged]

He's trying to use what he thinks society thinks to prove me wrong, when my point is you shouldn't be expected to think how society thinks, especially when there is a double standard.

And if female hair loss isn't natural, why does spironolactone work?

Finally, my point was not that it's easier to grow back hair than lose weight (although in certain individuals I can see that being the case.) My point was if someone isn't doing anything to face the problem which is affecting their appearance negatively, then why should anyone be sympathetic to their condition? Hair loss can be overcome, so my point is he's not a victim if he's not doing anything about it.

 

[tchehov]

He's trying to use what he thinks society thinks to prove me wrong, when my point is you shouldn't be expected to think how society thinks, especially when there is a double standard.

I agree entirely.

I suspect there are a few individuals here for whom hair loss is a dubious liberation, they feel ostracised from their peer group for the first time in their lives and are having to think...they suspect the double standard at last...but at what cost!

 

[Follically Challenged]

I agree entirely.

I suspect there are a few individuals here for whom hair loss is a dubious liberation, they feel ostracised from their peer group for the first time in their lives and are having to think...they suspect the double standard at last...but at what cost!

Thanks for agreeing with me. I don't understand what you are saying though.

 

[tchehov]

It's not anything important, FC - I was just thinking about something the original poster on this thread said:

People are assholes even ur friends, right after he said it no body said anything to add to it, but it still pissed me off.

 

[Guest]

Male and female hair loss are comparable. Female loss is less common but just as devastating to the sufferer. And why should male hair loss be more acceptable - because it's more common? I don't think so - we are all individuals and therefore respond according to our capacity for pain. The fact that male hair loss has been around for generations does not diminish the pain I feel.

Of couse it doesn't, but it still isn't a life-threatening condition and there's millions of bald/balding men around. It's not uncommon. And I remember you mentioning that you're 31! Especially at that age hair loss is definitely not weird. You probably have other problems aswell.

Why shouldn't men care about their physical form - it's my representation to the world. In this increasingly shallow society it's our first point of contact and what we are initially judged on. And if it doesn't matter why do all these guys spend hours in the gym? Why did you shave your head? Because you care about your physical appearance. And rightly so...

Hehe, yeah I do care about how I look to a certain point. But a lot less than many others on this board, it seems. That's probably because I have never felt that I'm handsome or anything, so I feel this hairloss can't make me that much uglier. I can't let my life end because I'm loosing my hair, it's not like I'm the only one who's suffering of this normal, genetic condition. Many of you seem to think that these "medications" will help everyone when it clearly isn't so. Many of hairloss sufferers will just have to face the fact that they'll be bald in a few years. The medications may or may not slow the loss, but for most of us they're not much of a cure. And incase you haven't noticed, in this "increasingly shallow society", as you put it, more and more balding guys are shaving their heads instead of wearing rugs. Even many guys with full heads of hair are shaving, and IMO that just shows that baldness isn't considered that ugly anymore.

 

[s.a.f]

I've noticed that mens hair in general seems to be getting shorter and shorter. In the 70's most men had long fringes and shoulder length hair. In the 80's there were a lot of bouffant styles around (still longish on top but shorter on the sides and back) and it was only in the 90's where the shaved head really emerged. Before that only skinheads and hooligans sported this style. I can remember seeing Rocky 4 in 1985 and being shocked at how short Dolph Lungdren had his hair, but today that would not be classed as very short at all.