Rock n roll lovin aliens stole my hair!

jackjones

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Strange as this may seem,
a few years ago when I was walking home from a night out ,I saw this..what seemd to be a .. a V.W yes it was definitly a V.W, and this really really bright white light. Over the coming weeks and months I noticed I had less and less hair on my head!, a few weeks later I was out with friends again and it was a lovely summers night so I decided to walk home again, low and behold I saw this bloody V.W and a really bright light. I had loads to drink so my memory is a bit hazy, but all of a sudden I came around!,I dont think I was in Kansas no more,
I seemd to be in a big white room quite metalic like, smooth surfaces, next thing I know is there is these little 3.5ft white creatures with big eyes and get this guys" elvis presley hair cuts!!, no a hair anywhere else on there frail bodies just these big elvis duck *** quiffs! I said to myself ..sh*t what was in that smoke I was smoking, but then one of them turned to me and telepathically spoke to me in the worst ever impersonation of an elvis voice, he said " no this is real its not an hallucination, just as he said that, "hound dog" came blasting through some audio speaker system I couldnt see and these little creatures all started trying to do the leg-twitching elvis dance moves, this was too bizarre for me so I staggered over to what looked like a door, one of the little guys stopped me and again telepathically said, "On your planet Elvis is the king, to us he is our king! the only way we can show our love and respect for him is to Wear his hair style, we tried looking for elvis comstumes but the ones they make for your earth little people "dwarfs" were all sold out, We have selected many males across the globe and every night when you earthlings are sleeping we enter your bedrooms and steal you hair from the follicle" if its only blonde hair we get some nights we have to dye it"

Now this was actually all starting to make sense to me so I said to him "but surely if we cannot stop you guys doing this we have medications like "finasteride and dutasteride and minoxidil so the hairs will grow back, he turned looked at me and in that stupid telepathically impersonated voice of elvis and chuckled "he he he he he have you grown your hair back to the way it was before we started cultivating your head?" "well eh no I said" at best its merley slowed it down maybe a little regrowth" yes he said well that little regrowth is what were hoping for because when your well into your forties we,ll come back and finish the job!

Little b*stards I though, thats all I can remember from my encounter that night!, but the jokes on them!
Because the next moring when I woke up there was a good few hairs on my pillow,
so "up yours aliens ya missed a few"!!!!!

:hump:
 

cuebald

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:punk: :punk: Makes more sense than some of Hoppi/MrE's theories! :punk: :punk:
 

dirtyHairy

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Funny, same stuff happend to me, didn't want to mention it before, because I didn't want to stand out as a drunk !
 

jhart

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it all fits together so elegantly. i might start wearing a bald cap in public to thwart off my abduction
 
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