guess what kind of ****in coincidence i had

Exodus2011

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One time I drank way too much liquor (it was some whiskey that tasted too good, i was drinking it like beer) and got completely trashed. between throwing up the pudding i was eating i felt like utter **** and called a suicide hotline

the guy on the other end asked how he could help and i asked him "what would you do if you went bald as a 20 year old man?". now, usually i dont mention baldness as what is bothering me since most people dont go bald and wudnt be able to relate. they woulld give me the usual bull**** they tell you, "be confident", "shave your head", etc

BUT THIS GUY WAS A FELLOW ANDROGENIC NORWOOD WARRIOR. he said "wow, that has got to be tough. i am 25 with a receding hairline and it really sucks". small world lol.

although considering its often psychology majors that work in mental health hotlines, its not really too much of a coincidence. it would make sense for a young baldie to go into psychology, a way to introspect into the sadness caused by his hair loss
 

Lollerme

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I called suicide hotlines quite often in my summer of 2010, when crap really started to hit the fan and I was surely transitioning to bald territory.

I had violent panic attacks that made me want to throw myself out the window. I needed a voice to reassure me, to prevent me from making a mistake.

And I think you were lucky Exodus. All the men I had on the phone, they never had a clue. They gave me the BS you're talking about.

"If I were you, I would chose to let it go and look like Yul Brynner". So it made things worse in fact, you're not reassured by that kind of generic comments.

Thank you for sharing that story Exodus.

panic attack because you were losing your hair? Wow....
 

Wolf Pack

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As men you are not supposed to express emotion, especially about so called superficial things like hair, this is how society has made it. Why do you think most suicides, particularly violent methods are by men? Women usually do things for attention and get the appropriate help.

This individual as Exodus mentioned was working in mental health. Day to day you will see men hide their insecurities unless they are very drunk then sometimes will mention it.
 

swingline747

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I've lost an entire group of friends during a holiday because I've showed my emotions and how much hair loss was affecting me.

Some people in the group could understand, I was 19, and already looking like a full NW5 when I was in the outdoors pool!

I wish I could get that picture back where you can already see me as a bald man at that age. It crushed me.

Can you imagine that? Looking like a NW5 old grandpa at only 19? How can someone experience that and not fall into a deep depression?

I was surrounded by hot Russian teen girls in that hotel and I thought "now they are out of reach, I will stay a virgin forever, I will never have fun and be happy again."

I was crying all the time, drinking so much it was making things even worse. I had hoped they would understand, but society doesn't want to understand other people's genuine pain.

It makes me think about a quote from the movie Oldboy:


One thing I can be thankful for is my small group of close friends. They act like they cant understand why Im pissy about the hair loss but in the end they get it. They try to do the preverbial confidence boosting crap but in the end never push it, let me vent and move along on the topic.
Its fair game when we're messing with each other but they would never pull it out in a public place. Same when my best friend was REALLY heavy. In our group its a dig but out in public if anyone ever made fun of his weight we were all fighting.
They know how hard I work, work out and stay in shape and can tell how this uncontrollable degradation in my looks kills me
 

CaptainForehead

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As men you are not supposed to express emotion, especially about so called superficial things like hair, this is how society has made it. Why do you think most suicides, particularly violent methods are by men? Women usually do things for attention and get the appropriate help.

This individual as Exodus mentioned was working in mental health. Day to day you will see men hide their insecurities unless they are very drunk then sometimes will mention it.


I wonder about this. I see people everyday, acquaintances, who are ugly/short, and I wonder how they REALLY feel, behind the superficial carefree facade we all have to put up. I wonder how depressed they are, how depressed they get over not being able to have reasonable looking girlfriends. Whether it kills them that a tall decent looking dude making half as much as them in a low paying job still gets better women than them.
And of course I cant talk about any of this IRL.

It's like gourmetstylewellness.com is where I have the most real conversations.
 

resu

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Bald men shame themselves first as a defensive mechanism, how many times have I heard bald men make a pathetic joke about their hair loss like "hair today gone tomorrow". I always found this self pity really lame, I don't joke about my hair loss at all, if people would make a joke about my hair loss I wouldn't say anything at all other than nod in approval "yeah it's true I'm balding", let them feel guilty and never show weakness.
 

CaptainForehead

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The list is infinite. Oddly they don't have one of these magic words for white men. It's the last bastion not affected by political correctness really. White bald or balding men is the only group of people that can be shamed and mocked with no social consequences whatsoever, it's even encouraged!
Actually, you can make fun of men of any ethnicity, so long as the jab is not racial. Short/bald/scrawny jabs are ubiquitous in all nationalities for all ethnicities.
 

EvilLocks

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Hair loss is no laughing matter. If people dare to make fun of my hair, I will redirect the conversation to the disabled, the overweight and the diseased and laugh about them.

People suddenly stop laughing and give me this dead serious look: "Man you can't joke and laugh about that!"

But laughing about hair loss which is a horrible disease for both your appearance and your mind is totally OK right?

And if it's not enough, I tell them my story, that usually shuts them up and make them feel guilty. They really have no clue about our trauma.

You are so right to do that, puts them in their place.

People think that hair is a trivial matter but for a lot of people losing their hair = losing their identity = major depression = no joke.

I guess as a woman people won't laugh at my hair loss but they will still treat me differently, and not in a good way.
 

Lollerme

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Hair loss is no laughing matter. If people dare to make fun of my hair, I will redirect the conversation to the disabled, the overweight and the diseased and laugh about them.

People suddenly stop laughing and give me this dead serious look: "Man you can't joke and laugh about that!"

But laughing about hair loss which is a horrible disease for both your appearance and your mind is totally OK right?

And if it's not enough, I tell them my story, that usually shuts them up and make them feel guilty. They really have no clue about our trauma.
LOL
 
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