Having Full head of hair would change my life

[sandovalusa]

LOL. I just recently became bald, but I'm locked in the state of mind of a guy with a full head of hair. I wonder if it will catch up with me.

Maybe it will if I hang out in this thread long enough.

 

[Nene]

LOL. I just recently became bald, but I'm locked in the state of mind of a guy with a full head of hair. I wonder if it will catch up with me.

Maybe it will if I hang out in this thread long enough.

Please No! People like you give me hope. It's refreshing to see a VERY bald VERY young guy taking it so well. :bravo: I hope I can be like you when I'm a full blown baldy.

 

[Obsidian]

fix the REAL core issue in order to escape the state of mind. ie, the ones who are bald, are screwed up since you cant cure baldness.

But if you can't fix it, doesn't that mean you should let it go?

 

[Smooth]

There is nothing you can do ...personally i've decided im not giving up without a fight, aiming towards getting hair transplant in few years from now.

 

[Eureka]

I side with Obsidian though. If it's beyond your absolute control, move past it. The grass is always greener on the other side, but for as many which have a better yard than yourself, there's as many that have a worse one.

 

[uncomfortable man]

fix the REAL core issue in order to escape the state of mind. ie, the ones who are bald, are screwed up since you cant cure baldness.

But if you can't fix it, doesn't that mean you should let it go?

Well Q is always barking at us to man up and take responsibility... but how do you take responsibility for something that you can't control? If you were to wake up tomorrow with an nw5, then I hardly doubt you would be so casually dismissive about it. It is easy to have a Ce la vie attitude about hairloss from the security of a full head of hair. Sometimes you just have to let people grieve... if there was ever a place to do that it would be here. But there are some on these boards (including yourself) that try to trivialize our suffering and try to take away our right to be upset about our situation. It is hypocritical, since you obviously felt insecure enough about your hair loss to become a member of this site, but yet others who are worse off than you aren't allowed to be frustrated with our hair loss? How is that fair?

 

[Obsidian]

Well Q is always barking at us to man up and take responsibility... but how do you take responsibility for something that you can't control?

I don't think he is asking you take responsibility for your baldness in that it is your fault, he is asking you to take responsibility for your life. I don't believe anyone thinks hair = life

If you were to wake up tomorrow with an nw5, then I hardly doubt you would be so casually dismissive about it. It is easy to have a Ce la vie attitude about hairloss from the security of a full head of hair.

I'm sure I wouldn't like it but what else could I do? My hair is gone. I would just have to let it go and move on, I mean other than buzzing it down or slapping on a wig which sounds like a lot of money. Letting go of something doesn't mean you have to like it. I don't like at times that I am short but what else can I do but just make the best out of a bad situation?

Sometimes you just have to let people grieve... if there was ever a place to do that it would be here. But there are some on these boards (including yourself) that try to trivialize our suffering and try to take away our right to be upset about our situation.

Yes I agree sometimes you need to grieve, but there is a difference between grieving and letting it become an obsession and controlling your life. The problem is with most people is they get stuck in the five stages of grief. Most switch between Anger and depression, you are just as guilty of this as anyone else and me. You have also made this into an obsession where I have a hard time believing it has not affected your relationship with others and to be productive in life.

It is hypocritical, since you obviously felt insecure enough about your hair loss to become a member of this site, but yet others who are worse off than you aren't allowed to be frustrated with our hair loss? How is that fair?

Oh my i'm a hypocrite. Can you tell me someone who is not? I don't like my hair-loss but I have yet to see guys with extremely noticable hair-loss being singled out. Like I said, I can understand not liking it but what's the point of obsessing about it if you really cannot do anything about it? As far as life being fair, show me a doctrine that life is supposed to be fair? Life is what you make of it dude, and your attitude a lot of time determines it.

 

[Eureka]

If I woke up with an NW5 I'd get that tattooed hair. Seriously, it doesn't look half bad.

Plus, since hairloss happens slowly, I'm pretty sure most people, despite their level of hairloss, feel about the same. You always have less hair, never more, so you're always obsessing over how good you "used" you have it. Instead of focusing on how much worse it could get, until it get's worse.

 

[DoctorHouse]

I am impressed with your post Obsidian. Its very adult and mature advice. UM, I think for once, Obsidian is giving you that olive branch in his own way. I have to give him credit for at least trying to give you good advice.

 

[qball01]

fix the REAL core issue in order to escape the state of mind. ie, the ones who are bald, are screwed up since you cant cure baldness.

But if you can't fix it, doesn't that mean you should let it go?

Well Q is always barking at us to man up and take responsibility... but how do you take responsibility for something that you can't control? Sometimes you just have to let people grieve...

1) Exactly what Obi said...stop seeing being bald as something that you have to "fix"...its a part of you, for better or worse. You can fix how you see it and view yourself in spite of being bald...THAT is what you can fix. Me having been a fat guy is different....for one, it was a result of my laziness and general apathy towards my appearance. I didn't care how I looked...I didn't take care of my body or care about my wardrobe...so it reflected an unattractiveness about my personality that went beyond my looks. Plus, even from an aesthetic point of view...I'd rather be fit and bald than fat with hair...IMO being really fat completely alters your appearance in most cases far worse than hairloss does. Bottom line is, I could control being fat, I can't control being bald....Plus, at the time I was a teenager in middle and highschool, where people are FAR more shallow and one-track-minded than they become later in life. Appearance-related issues are far more important in highschool than afterwords IMO.

2) Your issue is that you turn yourself into a martyr. Such a victim...."grieve?!" How long can you "grieve" for your god-damn lack of hair until you just realize it is what it is and just move on? You've turned yourself into this heroic victim who gets victimized and ridiculed everywhere he goes. Its such bullshit! Yeah, you'll run into some ignorant f*****g people who make dumb f*****g comments. I hate that too...but its LIFE. You are going to encounter ignorance no matter what. I hate that about the world, but the best way to overcome it IMO is to be the best individual you can...offer value to other people and if they don't return it, then they didn't meet YOUR standards. If they think lesser for you of being bald...then you think lesser of them for being idiotic and ignorant...their negative opinion of you isn't anymore powerful than your negative opinion of them. You need to learn to stop giving your power away to random people by letting their opinion of you dictate how you feel about yourself...its hard yes, but not impossible. The first step comes by stopping the victim mentality. Just because you're bald it doesn't mean you're some lost little lamb in a forest of wolves, but you walk around harbouring that attitude. Everybody has flaws man....most people are insecure about something.

I mean seriously...shouldn't it make you HAPPY to consider to the idea that a lot of your suffering is in your head and that it IS possible to change how you see the world and how people react to you without having to change your being bald? I really think you need to accept the possibility that things can change based on your beliefs, and that your beliefs can in fact change...that way you could change your life without having to change your hair...that should be a welcoming refreshing thought! But with that said...I also think you need to consider the idea that you're so used to this mindset that you're "comfortable" with it (even if not on a conscious level). You're identified so deeply with this "woe is me" victim mindset...its become your fail safe excuse. No need for any deep introspection about your personality on your part, because its always your baldness to blame. Its Psychology 101 man...you're no different than the hoards of other human beings on this planet who are quick to blame an external problem they can't control instead of taking a long hard look at themselves and realizing the issue lies with THEM.

 

[Eureka]

1) Exactly what Obi said...stop seeing being bald as something that you have to "fix"...its a part of you, for better or worse. You can fix how you see it and view yourself in spite of being bald...THAT is what you can fix. Me having been a fat guy is different....for one, it was a result of my laziness and general apathy towards my appearance. I didn't care how I looked...I didn't take care of my body or care about my wardrobe...so it reflected an unattractiveness about my personality that went beyond my looks. Plus, even from an aesthetic point of view...I'd rather be fit and bald than fat with hair...IMO being really fat completely alters your appearance in most cases far worse than hairloss does. Bottom line is, I could control being fat, I can't control being bald....Plus, at the time I was a teenager in middle and highschool, where people are FAR more shallow and one-track-minded than they become later in life. Appearance-related issues are far more important in highschool than afterwords IMO.

More importantly. Being overweight causes health problems, and shortens your life span, bringing down your quality of life. Hair is specifically aesthetic.

It doesn't look half bad from a distance, or in pics. But how does it look up close in person, as in if a female was inspecting closely it from inches away?

I bet it looks fake...like when people who have no eyebrows pencil them in with eyeliner.

I admit I've never known anyone who has gotten it done. But I think with the right artist it looks pretty decent. Fake? I'm not sure about fake it would certainly feel fake no matter how good it looked. It's a coverup no matter how you slice it. Personally, for those people who draw their eyebrows on, generally it looks better than having no eyebrows. But that's just my opinion.

 

[sandovalusa]

It's a coverup no matter how you slice it. Personally, for those people who draw their eyebrows on, generally it looks better than having no eyebrows. But that's just my opinion.

If you try to hide something you end up making it more of an issue than it already is.

If you get tattoo hair or a toupee or wear a wig or get a hair transplant or always wear a hat, people will talk behind your back and try to peek at your hair/toupee/transplants. There will be rumors about you.

I shave it off and face the world without anything to hide.

 

[Smooth]

I shave it off and face the world without anything to hide.

trust me, we would love to be able to handle this like you. :dunno:

 

[Obsidian]

I am impressed with your post Obsidian. Its very adult and mature advice. UM, I think for once, Obsidian is giving you that olive branch in his own way. I have to give him credit for at least trying to give you good advice.

That is all I am trying to do, I realize I acted immature with him sometimes but we all do. Maturity comes with age and I am still learning, so is UM, so is everyone else here. If he is crying out for help, of course some people are going to react with concern. It is hard not to get frustrated when it feels like our advice/help is thrown back in our face in a passive-aggressive manner which of course in turn, normal for us to act offended.

 

[Obsidian]

I shave it off and face the world without anything to hide.

trust me, we would love to be able to handle this like you. :dunno:

But don't you already shave your head and you guys are close to the same age? I am not saying you can just all of sudden act like him but shouldn't you at least entertain the idea?

 

[FSHGLD]

1) Exactly what Obi said...stop seeing being bald as something that you have to "fix"...its a part of you, for better or worse. You can fix how you see it and view yourself in spite of being bald...THAT is what you can fix. Me having been a fat guy is different....for one, it was a result of my laziness and general apathy towards my appearance. I didn't care how I looked...I didn't take care of my body or care about my wardrobe...so it reflected an unattractiveness about my personality that went beyond my looks. Plus, even from an aesthetic point of view...I'd rather be fit and bald than fat with hair...IMO being really fat completely alters your appearance in most cases far worse than hairloss does. Bottom line is, I could control being fat, I can't control being bald....Plus, at the time I was a teenager in middle and highschool, where people are FAR more shallow and one-track-minded than they become later in life. Appearance-related issues are far more important in highschool than afterwords IMO.

More importantly. Being overweight causes health problems, and shortens your life span, bringing down your quality of life. Hair is specifically aesthetic.

[quote:17l3kqlu]It doesn't look half bad from a distance, or in pics. But how does it look up close in person, as in if a female was inspecting closely it from inches away?

I bet it looks fake...like when people who have no eyebrows pencil them in with eyeliner.

I admit I've never known anyone who has gotten it done. But I think with the right artist it looks pretty decent. Fake? I'm not sure about fake it would certainly feel fake no matter how good it looked. It's a coverup no matter how you slice it. Personally, for those people who draw their eyebrows on, generally it looks better than having no eyebrows. But that's just my opinion.[/quote:17l3kqlu]


I can't understand how you think tattoo'd hair is a good idea..You'd have to shave every day for the rest of your like for it to not look extremely obvious and ridiculous..And I imagine the vast majority of women would think you were insane for doing it..

 

[Obsidian]

1) Exactly what Obi said...stop seeing being bald as something that you have to "fix"...its a part of you, for better or worse. You can fix how you see it and view yourself in spite of being bald...THAT is what you can fix. Me having been a fat guy is different....for one, it was a result of my laziness and general apathy towards my appearance. I didn't care how I looked...I didn't take care of my body or care about my wardrobe...so it reflected an unattractiveness about my personality that went beyond my looks. Plus, even from an aesthetic point of view...I'd rather be fit and bald than fat with hair...IMO being really fat completely alters your appearance in most cases far worse than hairloss does. Bottom line is, I could control being fat, I can't control being bald....Plus, at the time I was a teenager in middle and highschool, where people are FAR more shallow and one-track-minded than they become later in life. Appearance-related issues are far more important in highschool than afterwords IMO.

More importantly. Being overweight causes health problems, and shortens your life span, bringing down your quality of life. Hair is specifically aesthetic.

[quote:33b3vq7v]It doesn't look half bad from a distance, or in pics. But how does it look up close in person, as in if a female was inspecting closely it from inches away?

I bet it looks fake...like when people who have no eyebrows pencil them in with eyeliner.

I admit I've never known anyone who has gotten it done. But I think with the right artist it looks pretty decent. Fake? I'm not sure about fake it would certainly feel fake no matter how good it looked. It's a coverup no matter how you slice it. Personally, for those people who draw their eyebrows on, generally it looks better than having no eyebrows. But that's just my opinion.

I can't understand how you think tattoo'd hair is a good idea..You'd have to shave every day for the rest of your like for it to not look extremely obvious and ridiculous..And I imagine the vast majority of women would think you were insane for doing it..[/quote:33b3vq7v]

I also wonder how it looks in the sunlight, which is the true test.

 

[Eureka]

MM, well personally, when I used to shave my head it wasn't that big of a deal. Roughly 15 minutes once you get into a routine. And that was shaving my entire head. It takes me roughly the same amount of time to apply rogaine and style my hair anyway..

As for people thinking "I'm crazy" I wouldn't be doing it for other people. I honestly think, based on the pics I've seen of it done well, that it looks good. If I like the way it looks, as opposed to a shiny palette, then it would make sense for me to do it.

A bad hair transplant is more permanent than a bad tattoo.

 

[s.a.f]

A bad hair transplant is more permanent than a bad tattoo.

Not really since you can go to another surgeon who can use more donor to disguise bad work, which is what I did. With the Tattoo you'd be forced to wear a wig.

 

[Eureka]

With the Tattoo you'd be forced to wear a wig.

Tattoo removal?

But agreed about tattoo hair, wigs/toupees, hair transplants...their all the same as far the way people treat you if you are detected (and most of the time, you will be).

But what's your aim? Is your aim for everyone to think you have a full head of hair? Then yeah you could have problems. But Mine wouldn't be to give that impression, it would be to look better. I could care less whether or not someone buys it off as "natural" I dunno why anyone would be embarrassed about someone knowing about a good hair transplant, or a tattoo that looks good, or a wig that looks great.

If you get one of those procedures, and you constantly walk around paranoid about whether or not someone knows you've had one.. then doesn't that defeat the purpose?