Insensitive bald shaming in my social circle

[Caillou]

A lot of my friends are heavily balding for some reason. They all were fullheads 2-3 years ago and now they're bordering on NW4, even though they're still 21-22 years old. I hair mog them hard, and i'm thin NW2 myself, that's how bad it is


Anyway, one of the balding guys has extremely thin hairline, almost non-existent. He obviously feels like sh*t about it since he always tries to hide it with his hands and he grew out his sides and back hair to compensate with a curly combover. The problem is that his sides and back are so thick and curly that they make his hairline look even worse, especially if he's swimming or getting hit by the wind


I feel bad for him, but my other fullheaded friends bald shame him from time to time, especially cause he's so skinny and not particularly tall. Calling him the names of characters that are bald and laughing at his head and stuff like that. I told them to stop because it obviously hurts him even if he doesn't say so, but they didn't take me seriously and told me "it's no big deal"


Am i being autistic as usual socially and it's really not a big deal or people truly don't give a sh*t about baldness/bald men?

 

[Wolf Pack]

No autism there, I think this is just how boys/men are, it's all in the name of banter and usually not intended for harm between friends. Unfortunately there may be some who do it to put others down for whatever reason, could be that they are jealous/dislike that guy for something or another or are just insecure themselves and want to feel better. So really you know these guys best and their history/personalities. In my experience, sometimes these things are bullying, other times it's just for fun and they even laugh at themselves over stuff. Of course girl groups are way more sensitive with each other but gossip like hell behind their backs - guys are better company

 

[doubleindemnity]

It's both I think. Most people who have hair think that it's not a big deal. But, also, most people don't care how others feel after receiving their bullying. If one person bullies, others will join. That's just normal and I think that it hearkens back to the schoolyard. I hope that you don't give him a hard time and don't tell him whether his hairstyle looks good or not. He knows and remember that it's his hair so he decides how he wears it. Some guys prefer the horseshoe or combover to the buzzcut; what's wrong with that?

 

[Caillou]

It's both I think. Most people who have hair think that it's not a big deal. But, also, most people don't care how others feel after receiving their bullying. If one person bullies, others will join. That's just normal and I think that it hearkens back to the schoolyard. I hope that you don't give him a hard time and don't tell him whether his hairstyle looks good or not. He knows and remember that it's his hair so he decides how he wears it. Some guys prefer the horseshoe or combover to the buzzcut; what's wrong with that?

I didn't tell him anything about his hair myself, but i recommended minoxidil and dermaroller, explained how and why they work, and that they might be a good alternative to shaving it off

 

[KevinEdEddEddy]

Yeah bullying seems to be prevalent when you are balding. Many times I have heard my hair are disgusting, because I sported long diffused on top hair. Negative comments ended when I buzzed it short. But I think you will be bullied if you are short, ugly, have acne etc. so losing your hair is just one of reasons, most of the time dissing occurs when someone is called out to use hair systems, hair fibers, combovers or wigs. I don't think that shaving/buzzing is so bad after all, of course you will be labeled as 'bald' but many times in respectful tone.

 

[KevinEdEddEddy]

Also, you are kind of lucky to have friends who are also balding, because they know your pain. In my social circle every one has beautiful NW1 thick hair :/

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

We passed a freshly married couple today who wanted to take picturesque wedding pictures in my home town (which turned into a tourist trap as exemplified but that's another story). And my gf's mother said extremely loud in front of the couple: 'They marry and she chose a baldie-bald like that..'. And then all three of them started the baldie groom's shortcomings and the pros in cons of marrying someone with such a handicap in front of the bride and the groom until I stopped them.
Dude it was brutal

 

[Caillou]

We passed a freshly married couple today who wanted to take picturesque wedding pictures in my home town (which turned into a tourist trap as exemplified but that's another story). And my gf's mother said extremely loud in front of the couple: 'They marry and she chose a baldie-bald like that..'. And then all three of them started the baldie groom's shortcomings and the pros in cons of marrying someone with such a handicap in front of the bride and the groom until I stopped them.
Dude it was brutal

Your gf and her family are pure garbage

 

[BurningCoals]

I was driving with my friends one day and one of them said to me "Hey wanna get your hairline fixed up hehehe".

But ironically he's balding too so I wonder for how long he'll think that's funny.

 

[Caillou]

I was driving with my friends one day and one of them said to me "Hey wanna get your hairline fixed up hehehe".

But ironically he's balding too so I wonder for how long he'll think that's funny.

Maybe he knows he's balding and he's insecure about it and that's why he's trying to bring you down, to feel better about himself

 

[BurningCoals]

Maybe he knows he's balding and he's insecure about it and that's why he's trying to bring you down, to feel better about himself

Could be, though I don't think it's anything malicious, our group tends to joke about each other all the time.

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

Your gf and her family are pure garbage

Hey, my gf's response was to make some bluepilled defensive remarks about how it's not just about looks but character as well. But either way, if they are garbage they are still a thousand times more valuable than you.

 

[Caillou]

Hey, my gf's response was to make some bluepilled defensive remarks about how it's not just about looks but character as well. But either way, if they are garbage they are still a thousand times more valuable than you.

You didn't explain that your gf wasn't in on the balding shaming since you talked about how the "three of them" kept shitting on the bald guy. If your gf wasn't in on it as i thought, then i'm sorry for insulting her and i take back what i said


However, the fact that her mom is a massive b**ch still stands

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

You didn't explain that your gf wasn't in on the balding shaming since you talked about how the "three of them" kept shitting on the bald guy. If your gf wasn't in on it as i thought, then i'm sorry for insulting her and i take back what i said


However, the fact that her mom is a massive b**ch still stands

I said they discussed the baldie shortcomings and the pros and cons of marrying a bald man.
The mother isn't a bad person, just a bit upfront sometimes and unaware of her loud voice.

 

[NickyA]

Could be, though I don't think it's anything malicious, our group tends to joke about each other all the time.

I've yet to meet anyone who notices hair loss before Norwood 3 stage that isn't concerned by it himself. When I was a kid anyone with a Norwood 2.5, a dense NW3 or better had nice hair to me... All the people I've heard commenting on hair loss are bald, have bald or balding close relatives, or are afraid of losing hair... My Norwood -1 dad became a serious norwood spotter in his 50s after many of his close friends went bald.

 

[BurningCoals]

I've yet to meet anyone who notices hair loss before Norwood 3 stage that isn't concerned by it himself. When I was a kid anyone with a Norwood 2.5, a dense NW3 or better had nice hair to me... All the people I've heard commenting on hair loss are bald, have bald or balding close relatives, or are afraid of losing hair... My Norwood -1 dad became a serious norwood spotter in his 50s after many of his close friends went bald.

Yeah, makes sense. Before this hair loss stuff started I rarely thought of it (occasionally the idea of going bald would scare me but not much more), so I never really noticed someone with some recession or a bit of thinning unless it was pointed out. Nowadays someone's hairline/density is literally the first thing I notice in someone.

 

[KevinEdEddEddy]

I've yet to meet anyone who notices hair loss before Norwood 3 stage that isn't concerned by it himself. When I was a kid anyone with a Norwood 2.5, a dense NW3 or better had nice hair to me... All the people I've heard commenting on hair loss are bald, have bald or balding close relatives, or are afraid of losing hair... My Norwood -1 dad became a serious norwood spotter in his 50s after many of his close friends went bald.

My friends in high school noticed my NW2 when nobody even thought about losing hair

 

[justinbieberscombover]

We passed a freshly married couple today who wanted to take picturesque wedding pictures in my home town (which turned into a tourist trap as exemplified but that's another story). And my gf's mother said extremely loud in front of the couple: 'They marry and she chose a baldie-bald like that..'. And then all three of them started the baldie groom's shortcomings and the pros in cons of marrying someone with such a handicap in front of the bride and the groom until I stopped them.
Dude it was brutal

Aren't you bald yourself

 

[fauxhawk]

Aren't you bald yourself

Atleast he knows what to expect on his wedding day rofl

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

Aren't you bald yourself

No.thinning. In a weird pattern.

Atleast he knows what to expect on his wedding day rofl

lol yeah...I joked about shaving before marrying just to spite my gf's mum afterwards. Anyways, the ex of my girl is like NW5 without any redeeming features to set that off...I guess I'll be fine in that regard.

Another layer of irony to that story btw: My gf's mum is thinning visibly since her early twenties due to a severe incident of food poisoning.