Message to Young Balders

GourmetNM

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Hey everyone,

I used to post here occassionally a long time ago, but forgot my username ;)

I was just going over the board and I see a lot of young guys that were exactly how I was. I started balding at 16 and it really owned my life for a few years.
I just want to say to the young guys that feel like their whole life is ruined, it's not as bad as you think. It is still a concern for me, but a mere fragment of what it used to be. It does take a little while to get used to and realize you now fit into the "Balding" category but once you do it's not as freaky.
I even went through a period for a couple of years where I was obsessed with other people's hair. I would look at every man's hairline before his face, be it in person or on TV. Everytime I saw a balding man, I felt better. Everytime I saw one with a full head of hair it pissed me of. I bet there are a few of you that can relate to me.
Just realize that your hair looks WAY worse to you than it does to anyone else.
But really what I have to say is it's not worth all the worry and headaches. If you decide to treat it, fine. But don't obssess over it. It is not the "end all be all" and it doesn't mean you can never be attractive again.

Anyway, I know this was all kinda cheesy and won't matter to a lot of people but it's something I wish someone had said to me when I was younger.
 

Styles

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thanks

I read your message and actually felt better about myself
I'm not that young(22) but i've almost lost all hair in front.

Ive been having a particulary bad hair day today since i looked at some pics taken of me with my digital camera.

Yeah i think i'm obsessing way too much over it, but it seems like such a big thing in my life right now.

Anyways your message was kinda uplifting to me and i'm sure other ppl think so too.
 

iwanthair

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I was also around age 16 when my hair started to thin... I am 19 now and it is pretty noticable. Im not sure I am past the thinking about it all the time stage, I hate it whenever I see those commericials for hair transplants when other people are in the room, I feel like everyone's eyes are on me. I wish I wasn't so sensitive about it, thats the hard part.. I pretty much have given up on trying to fix it.

I have found that a good way to boost your self esteem is to spend a lot of time on the gym, if you have a good body and you are strong I am hoping that it will cancel out the balding..
 

GourmetNM

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I understand what you mean. Just try to remember that with time it isn't such a big deal. Also, remember that you think about it WAY more than anyone else. To them, you're you. To yourself your a bald freak :)
 

guy83

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Well I so can relate. I have been having my hairloss since 16.
I just turned 21 and I still have the problem.

Thanks for youre words I feel better as well. :)
 

bombscience

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Nice post gourmet, it helps to keep things in perspective that life goes on past hairloss.

Yet, I'm still really insecure about my hair getting any worse than it already is. It's particularly hard to step up to the plate and try to treat hairloss only to slowly lose. But I remind myself that every minute I worry is just a minute of wasted time, because when it comes down to it, I'm doing everything I can.
 

Rage

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Actually, one of the main reasons I wanted to start some sort of treatment was so I could stop thinking about it. Much of my worrying was alleviated when I started some treatment.. now i don't even worry about it when i put the minoxidil, or eat the propecia.. its just so automatic. This peace of mind is the best $$$$AUD i've ever bought!

Perhaps the only thing left is to never visit this forum and never post ever again..
 

ChiaHead

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I too started balding at about 18 or so and I didnt start doing something about til a year ago. About 2 years ago, male pattern baldness started ruining my life. I was completely obsessed with my hairloss and basically lost all my confidence. I didnt date for those 2 years and life pretty much sucked. I was much more materialistic then and thought that looks were everything. So much has changed. Life does get better and you will eventually let go of your insecurities. Life is much better when you feel comfortable in your own skin. Fortunately, the big 3 has helped me tremendously and im starting to look my age again. Im really happy I found this site, its changed my life without a doubt.
 

iwanthair

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I could use some help/advice

I am 19, a couple weeks ago I broke up with my frist serious girlfriend of a year and a half. Since then I have found that she has hooked up with someone else. Right now I am freaking that I will never get *** or be with anyone again... When i go to parties I try to hook up but I don't have any confidence!! the whole night i am thinking that I just look bald to all the girls. Is anyone in my boat? or has been in my boat..

By the way the other night at a party this bald dude was totally macking on this girl, dancing all over her and she was totally into it.. I wish that could be me but i dont have sh*t for confidence right now.. ahhhhhhh

Anyone else feelin me?
 

Kramer3

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Yeah I try to stay optimistic about my hairs appearence but I can't help but feel inadaquete next to my friends with the thickest mane's of hair. It sucks because all I need is just a little more density and I would be in the clear. I just want to go back to the stage where I could flirt with girls without having to be self-conscience.
In the end you just have to try and be yourself and realize that your hair will always look worse to you then it will to anyone else.
 
G

Guest

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Kramer3 said:
In the end you just have to try and be yourself and realize that your hair will always look worse to you then it will to anyone else.

That is the truth.
 

AZJ

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Good post man. I'm almost 22 and started losing my hair about three years ago. I didn't do anything until nine months ago. About the time I started doing something, my hair got to the point where I couldn't style it anymore. Now I've grown it out to be pretty long (it is curly so I can get away with it.)

It sucks because I have to wear a hat everywhere and can't do my hair like I used to. I'm sick of constantly thinking about it and I admit that it has consumed my life, which sucks because I'm in college and have other things to worry about. I just wish that my medicine would start to work after nine months so I could feel just a little optimistic.

I also wish I could just get a hair transplant now and start completely over, but my hairloss is all over the top of my head and I'm not sure that I will be able to do that.

Sorry for the rant, but I enjoyed your post. I agree, it is much worse to us than anyone else, but it sucks going bald at this age.
 

Stokes

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Yeah man sucks big time........I'm reading all your guys post and I'm thinking to myself, "Yeah, yeah thats happened to me" its so great to have a annoynomous place like this to talk with other people that have the same problem.

I'm 22 and have been going bald for about 1 and a half years. I wear a hat all the time but I can gel my hair kind of on the special occassion like when i need to go clubbing and sh*t.

My advice to you guys out there is to go to a good hairdresser. Tell them about your problem.....I know its really hard talking about it to other people but you will find they are really compasionate. If you have curly hair then stick with curly hair, light coloured hair is a bonus. All chicks want is a guy with confidence, you have that you get the chicks.

If you havn't already done it yet go see your doctor about it. They might refer you to a dermatologist but remember if you don't have insurance its going to cost over $100 for an appointment. I think hats can be cool. Go to nice store and buy like 3 really nice pairs of hats. Might cost you a bit but its worth it.

I'm not trying to piss anyone off and I'm not saying that going bald is something you should be sad about. Most people that are in here are trying to do something about it thats why they came here.

As long as you have your health you might as well live your life as best as you can.

Good luck my fellow hair loss sufferors.
 

teqeeler

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I feel everyones pain.
I think it really all comes down to your personality and confidence when you did have hair and your communications skills i think.
if you possess all three then life wil be easy bald or with a full head of hair.
I remember in highschool, im 22 now, there was a kid who was completely bald by his senoir year, He came into high school with hair and left without any. I could have never handled it the way he did, but since he had a great personality, he never let it affect his confidence on the outside and he dated a hot girl his senoir year and has stuck with her, he never played sports, wasnt great at anything, but his confidence is what people were attracted to.
I look at me and ive never had much confidence in high school, but i had a full head of hair and i was always condsidered attractive to girls, because of my looks, not as much my personality. I had my ankle fused beginning of highschool and could no longer do the things i loved like going for jogs on summer mornings, playing soccer,bball and it was devastating to me because i was good at these sports, they were my life. i really didnt care that i feared social situations cause i could always rip it up on the field, so when i couldnt play i just had my hair and looks to make me feel good and becuase i had my hair i had alot more confidence then i do now, but i never really had that much to begin with.
I always new id go bald since my dad is, but i wasnt prepared for it when it happened. The last 1 1/2 years ive been shedding like crazy and it has totally changed my looks and has devastated my confidence. A friedn the other day who i hadnt seen since i started going bald, told me that i looked so much older, i didnt like to hearing that.
I always wear a hat now and it has become a problem because people ask what do you look like under your hat? I only work jobs where i know you can wear a hat, because i think it makes me better looking, since ive worked there this girl has liked me and has asked what my hair looks like and i freak and go away, cause she thinks im cute with it on. Its very frustrating to say the least, i hate worrying about it and just wish it didnt affect me, but im not a pretty bald like some guys are who can pull it off.
i think man im 22 and i should be enjoying life, not depressing.
 
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