So you think you have it bad?

[Axon]

Less crying. More domination.

Women come on to me randomly. I have hair loss and acne scars. I still do okay though. So can you. And as Jayman said, certainly don't place any amount of esteem in their perception of you.

 

[recboi]

The only way to get a woman is to have confidence,

yes confidence certainly helps in attracting a woman. if a woman sees that you have zero self confidence and is still attracted to you, chances are that she has zero self confidence too and you guys can be miserable together.

and the only way to get confidence is by getting women

NO. why do people measure their self-worth by their success with women? women are complicated creatures. there are many things that you can do to increase your confidence. go to the gym, learn a new hobby, go out and make new friends. you don't have to get with women to get confidence.

It's kind of like how women's self esteem comes from attention and approval from men. The common thread in guys that don't get women is that they lack confidence, and they lack confidence because they don't get women.

Remeber what the purpose of life is, to eat and reproduce. Everything else is BS. We're animals, and we're here to have sex. Sorry but all the other stuff is BS to make us feel like we're "above" other animals. We are animals.

 

[recboi]

Less crying. More domination.

Women come on to me randomly. I have hair loss and acne scars. I still do okay though. So can you. And as Jayman said, certainly don't place any amount of esteem in their perception of you.

I've had women come onto me too, I'd be a virgin if they didn't. Sure, it's also a numbers game. COnfidence, successful guys strike out with women more than betas do, because they try more. But you cannot succeed if you don't try. Problem with me is that each rejection is permanent and cannot get it out of my mind. Each rejection makes you less confident. though Im told you eventually get used to it.

 

[IBM]

What is BS? Bull sh*t?

 

[global]

A lot of guys in this thread are saying they have trouble getting women or lack confidence approaching them etc.

Something that has helped me a lot is the e-book and forum on this site, they also do a DVD series which looks great but I haven't got yet cos it's a bit pricey, but check it out -

http://www.themysterymethod.com/

It's not a miracle worker but it gives you some real tools to start approaching women in a way that is more likely to build attraction in them and at least increase your chances.

 

[still_trying]

baldguy 28:

Playing the "look how bad i've got it" game is not productive...and even if it is, there's at least 3 billion people on this planet who have it worse than you. Yes, you have it worse than a lot of people on this site do.

If you're trying to help us by saying "hey guys, it could be worse so lighten up", all good, but then you should be lightened by the existence of people who are starving to death in the middle of civil wars.

That said, of course you will be affected by your situation. A least you've identified your problems..now the thing you must do is try to change them, or they'll destroy you.

If your family are giving you grief, move away from them. Go travelling, go teach english in brazil. Anything. Start making your own choices.

Positive thinking is all well and good, but there's no point in being blindly optimistic - "i hate my family, have no friends and no job, but things are going great"...NO. However, saying "i hate my family, i have no friends, and no job, but things will get better for me, i will find a job, increase my confidence, get some friends who value me etc" is a good step.

If you wanna feel happy, why not get any menial job you can for 6 months, save as much as you can, and go to thailand for a few months, get a tan, meet some cool people, experience a different culture. (i just came back and the place rules).

 

[sunray73]

You just need to attack your problems head on instead of drowning in a pool of fear until there is nothing left... If you want to have someone write out the steps to take here they are:

1) Hit the gym hard (exercise, eat right, vitamins, protein shakes, the works..)
2) Get a job (yes looks do play a part in the hiring process but that is why you focus on something you CAN change right now... your body 'see step 1')
3) Save money for a hair transplant & lasik eye surgery (you're living at home so you can afford to save up enough money for both procedures).
4) Get away from your parents! (After you successfully obtained steps 1-3, move out and start living life! All doors at this point can and WILL be open to you. Be it a a new and better job, girlfriend(s), respect from your peers etc...)

How do I know this will work you ask? Because I have done it myself! I know you think you have it bad but I won't even start on what I had to go threw in my own life. Trust me on this, I would trade places with you(back in the day) in a heart beat. This past year, my new years resolution was to somehow get my life back on track. I wasn't making a ton of money but I was able to get a hair transplant, moles removed, nose job, porcelain veneers for my pearly new smile, and a chiseled body. It's freak'n night and day to how I was living life just a year ago. I decided that this was the year I was going to make changes and I did. I decided nothing was going to steer me away from my goal and it didn't.

Point is here... you can go on living EXACTLY how you think life will play out for you and chances are that it will. OR, you can decide enough is enough and take back your life. You're still young and have plenty of time to play the field. You just need to FOCUS and get the other things done and I will promise you that life will never be the same... Good luck and God bless...

p.s. I didn't have much money to do alot of these procedures so I actually bartered for services(i.e. computer support or creating a website for them etc...) The only thing I actually paid for was my hair transplant which I did get offers for trade but was a bit too far to travel. Dr. Richard Ochs had a practice near by where I live in Los Angeles and charges only $2 a graft. i think he also reimburses for travel expense as well... I got 4000 grafts just last month and can't wait until I see them growing in!!!!

 

[recboi]

baldguy 28:

Playing the "look how bad i've got it" game is not productive...and even if it is, there's at least 3 billion people on this planet who have it worse than you. Yes, you have it worse than a lot of people on this site do.

If you're trying to help us by saying "hey guys, it could be worse so lighten up", all good, but then you should be lightened by the existence of people who are starving to death in the middle of civil wars.

That said, of course you will be affected by your situation. A least you've identified your problems..now the thing you must do is try to change them, or they'll destroy you.

If your family are giving you grief, move away from them. Go travelling, go teach english in brazil. Anything. Start making your own choices.

Positive thinking is all well and good, but there's no point in being blindly optimistic - "i hate my family, have no friends and no job, but things are going great"...NO. However, saying "i hate my family, i have no friends, and no job, but things will get better for me, i will find a job, increase my confidence, get some friends who value me etc" is a good step.

If you wanna feel happy, why not get any menial job you can for 6 months, save as much as you can, and go to thailand for a few months, get a tan, meet some cool people, experience a different culture. (i just came back and the place rules).

Don't go to southern thailand. it's all out war there now. teachers are getting killed left and right by terrorists now. I don't know how long Phuket can stay out of it...

 

[recboi]

You just need to attack your problems head on instead of drowning in a pool of fear until there is nothing left... If you want to have someone write out the steps to take here they are:

1) Hit the gym hard (exercise, eat right, vitamins, protein shakes, the works..)
2) Get a job (yes looks do play a part in the hiring process but that is why you focus on something you CAN change right now... your body 'see step 1')
3) Save money for a hair transplant & lasik eye surgery (you're living at home so you can afford to save up enough money for both procedures).
4) Get away from your parents! (After you successfully obtained steps 1-3, move out and start living life! All doors at this point can and WILL be open to you. Be it a a new and better job, girlfriend(s), respect from your peers etc...)

How do I know this will work you ask? Because I have done it myself! I know you think you have it bad but I won't even start on what I had to go threw in my own life. Trust me on this, I would trade places with you(back in the day) in a heart beat. This past year, my new years resolution was to somehow get my life back on track. I wasn't making a ton of money but I was able to get a hair transplant, moles removed, nose job, porcelain veneers for my pearly new smile, and a chiseled body. It's freak'n night and day to how I was living life just a year ago. I decided that this was the year I was going to make changes and I did. I decided nothing was going to steer me away from my goal and it didn't.

Point is here... you can go on living EXACTLY how you think life will play out for you and chances are that it will. OR, you can decide enough is enough and take back your life. You're still young and have plenty of time to play the field. You just need to FOCUS and get the other things done and I will promise you that life will never be the same... Good luck and God bless...

p.s. I didn't have much money to do alot of these procedures so I actually bartered for services(i.e. computer support or creating a website for them etc...) The only thing I actually paid for was my hair transplant which I did get offers for trade but was a bit too far to travel. Dr. Richard Ochs had a practice near by where I live in Los Angeles and charges only $2 a graft. i think he also reimburses for travel expense as well... I got 4000 grafts just last month and can't wait until I see them growing in!!!!

Saving money with hair transplant is not the way to go. Sure $2 is cheap, but does the guy produce natural results? I had bad hair transplant, and it basically ruined my life for a very long time. My hair is only barely presentable after using up my entire donor supply on a tiny are of my head, and spending thousands in corrective procedures. A good hair transplant surgeon will probably cost a lot of money.

 

[sunray73]

You just need to attack your problems head on instead of drowning in a pool of fear until there is nothing left... If you want to have someone write out the steps to take here they are:

1) Hit the gym hard (exercise, eat right, vitamins, protein shakes, the works..)
2) Get a job (yes looks do play a part in the hiring process but that is why you focus on something you CAN change right now... your body 'see step 1')
3) Save money for a hair transplant & lasik eye surgery (you're living at home so you can afford to save up enough money for both procedures).
4) Get away from your parents! (After you successfully obtained steps 1-3, move out and start living life! All doors at this point can and WILL be open to you. Be it a a new and better job, girlfriend(s), respect from your peers etc...)

How do I know this will work you ask? Because I have done it myself! I know you think you have it bad but I won't even start on what I had to go threw in my own life. Trust me on this, I would trade places with you(back in the day) in a heart beat. This past year, my new years resolution was to somehow get my life back on track. I wasn't making a ton of money but I was able to get a hair transplant, moles removed, nose job, porcelain veneers for my pearly new smile, and a chiseled body. It's freak'n night and day to how I was living life just a year ago. I decided that this was the year I was going to make changes and I did. I decided nothing was going to steer me away from my goal and it didn't.

Point is here... you can go on living EXACTLY how you think life will play out for you and chances are that it will. OR, you can decide enough is enough and take back your life. You're still young and have plenty of time to play the field. You just need to FOCUS and get the other things done and I will promise you that life will never be the same... Good luck and God bless...

p.s. I didn't have much money to do alot of these procedures so I actually bartered for services(i.e. computer support or creating a website for them etc...) The only thing I actually paid for was my hair transplant which I did get offers for trade but was a bit too far to travel. Dr. Richard Ochs had a practice near by where I live in Los Angeles and charges only $2 a graft. i think he also reimburses for travel expense as well... I got 4000 grafts just last month and can't wait until I see them growing in!!!!

Saving money with hair transplant is not the way to go. Sure $2 is cheap, but does the guy produce natural results? I had bad hair transplant, and it basically ruined my life for a very long time. My hair is only barely presentable after using up my entire donor supply on a tiny are of my head, and spending thousands in corrective procedures. A good hair transplant surgeon will probably cost a lot of money.

Not true... do the homework before commenting. I actually consulted with Several hair transplant surgeons before making a decision. Truth is most hair transplant surgeons know and respect him. He has several papers written and even has an instrument that he designed that minimizes shock to the scalp, that other surgeons are incorporating into their own practice... I have seen his patients work as well and the results look awesome. but please anyone looking to get a hair transplant should visit this site: http://www.hairtransplantnetwork.com/ before making any decisions on hair transplant. I was VERY educated before making my decision...

 

[holyhair]

im a i the only one who sees the clear connection here?

he has been told he is useless by everyone around him so much and so long that ha no thinks its the truth.

you need to move out of there!

you need to build yourself up trough doing things that will confirm your value as a person.

Run and build !

 

[tchehov]

I have a lot of sympathy for Recboi's situation, Basically he is down there - I've been down there myself and I know that all the talk in the world is useless - it's foodstuff for unhappiness. He needs a hand up, but, as usual, Holyhair is completely right - after a while you begin to believe your worst fears about yourself, and helping yourself becomes as much of a problem as not doing so.

Recboi, you've gotta take back your life somehow. I wish I knew how to take back mine.

 

[abcdefg]

I like how they didnt even tell him how or why a pimple which it probably wasnt can do that to someone. Science should understand why or how so if it happens again we can try somethings to stop it. Thats terrible someone has to live with a fluke thing like that.