Social Drawbacks To Being An Incel ( Not Only Relationship )

[CaptainForehead]

I think I might need a f*****g Xanax more than a v****.

Also can relate. On my second visit, I was more mentally prepared, and I thought I wasn't spazzing out in terms of body language. But the first words out of the woman's mouth when we went into the private room? "Relax". The second woman said "Relax, I won't hurt you".

Makes me think I might also be telepathing my internalized incelism (terrific phrase BTW, you should be proud) in my day to day interaction (including at my workplace).

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Firstly you didn't indulge in all of the sh*t I just wrote about you, I don't know what that means.

It means that I expect to derive no value from engaging you. I don't expect you to deal with the ideas and to try and build toward greater understanding, I expect you to be petty and vindictive as you have been, so it's not productive.

I think I have a good idea of some of what ails you though, an accurate albeit incomplete picture. If you're open to discussing it in an adult manner, we can do so. However, I'll add that ultimately you need a professional evaluation and guidance, and that you'll have to be open-minded about it.

 

[Exodus2011]

Oh do not get me wrong! At all, I am not comparing apples with oranges. Undoubtedly being ugly and unappreciated is a far more lonely world than being attractive and over-appreciated. Basically I'm saying life is sh*t for everyone, if you have some self-awareness at least, the only way to truly survive in this world with eternal happiness, is to be pre-disposed with some form of humble mentality (which cannot be taught) or to be incredibly stupid.

If you are intelligent and self-aware, and don't have this ingrained humble mentality, you are always going to second guess yourself. Well the ugly or even average don't have to do this.

Exo I really like the way you can still take a step back and calmly explain this to me as I'm practically someone from a different universe to the world you've experienced, rather than just telling me I'm an entitled piece of sh*t.

lol i considered disliking the post . but i stopped myself as you are reasonable haha. i agree about life not being perfect for anyone, i mean most of my friends i would consider having it easier than me, but they generally are 'depressed' too, or at least say they are. i think theyre more just bored and existential, which is a good sign imo. it shows that you want to do meaningful things and are aware. i mean as we have discussed before the movie melancholia, i wasn't even triggered by the hot depressed girl. she was more just depressed about the state of life itself rather than her own life, i understood her pain so to speak.

no one's life is perfect, but what matters is if you are secure and happy a reasonable amoiunt of time, especially to where you feel generally satisfied and have a desire to continue living. a lot of psychological studies on happiness define it as "are you satisfied with your life" rather than "are you happy". the latter is way too vague. http://worlddatabaseofhappiness.eur.nl/hap_quer/introtext_measures3.pdf

no offense but i think that "humble" mentality is just not having narcissism. being accepting of your flaws and secure in yourself.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Also can relate. On my second visit, I was more mentally prepared, and I thought I wasn't spazzing out in terms of body language. But the first words out of the woman's mouth when we went into the private room? "Relax". The second woman said "Relax, I won't hurt you".

Makes me think I might also be telepathing my internalized incelism (terrific phrase BTW, you should be proud) in my day to day interaction (including at my workplace).

It's taken you several decades to internalize your incelism, just the fact that you went to a brothel a second time and actually did the deed is great and terrific progress. Honestly I'm impressed, and I think everybody should be. It might be the most impressive thing I've read on the forum in a while.

The woman telling you to relax shows that she's experienced and good at reading body language. The sex worker that I was with, by the way, actually asked me if I had been molested as a child. She's less subtle than yours was lol. That said, the fact that they can recognize these behaviors means that it's probably common.

You are probably telegraphing your psychological state. However, I wouldn't worry about it. Most people won't care that much, they're not your sex worker, it's not their job to interpret you and they're probably focused on other things.

 

[Exodus2011]

I just got a handjob, nothing impressive

Internalized incelism. Symptoms similar to having been molested as a child.



Telegraphing. That was the word I was looking for. I had actually first written "telescoping". Then googled, went to dictionary.com and figured out that wasn't the right word. Thank you.

lmao i know this telegraph word from watching UFC. it means when a fighter uses a move that was easy to predict or obvious .

and why didnt you want to go all the way cap? too anxious? do you mind describing the girl? how would you rate her?

 

[Exodus2011]

You feel pity for aesthetically-challenged people, other people like Rudiger feel revulsion (read his post ), and a lot of other people just don't care that much. They're not willing to date ugly people or have them in leadership positions, but they don't mind having them around.

For whatever it's worth I also feel pity for hopelessly ugly people. I work on a university campus, so I feel pity for the very short guys, and the guys who are NW2 or NW3 early in college. But that's because I (like you) overanalyze these issues, and thus I know what's in store for them.

yea well they prolly just dont wanna focus on something depressing like ugly people. or they will be in denial cuz its too shitty to think about. i was like this before hair loss. i didnt care for ugly people, but if i was forced to stop and think about them i'd feel pity for them

 

[CopeForLife]

It's taken you several decades to internalize your incelism, just the fact that you went to a brothel a second time and actually did the deed is great and terrific progress. Honestly I'm impressed, and I think everybody should be. It might be the most impressive thing I've read on the forum in a while.

The woman telling you to relax shows that she's experienced and good at reading body language. The sex worker that I was with, by the way, actually asked me if I had been molested as a child. She's less subtle than yours was lol. That said, the fact that they can recognize these behaviors means that it's probably common.

You are probably telegraphing your psychological state. However, I wouldn't worry about it. Most people won't care that much, they're not your sex worker, it's not their job to interpret you and they're probably focused on other things.

In a very first time, I went to a "massage salon" girl commented on my frame. Literally pointed to my waist and told wow so small.

I haven't taken an attention though because wasn't into PSL that times

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

lmao i know this telegraph word from watching UFC. it means when a fighter uses a move that was easy to predict or obvious .

and why didnt you want to go all the way cap? too anxious? do you mind describing the girl? how would you rate her?

Yeah I know it from hockey, as in "X is telegraphing his shot", when a player takes a long time to setup his play the opposing defense and goaltending has more time to respond.

yea well they prolly just dont wanna focus on something depressing like ugly people. or they will be in denial cuz its too shitty to think about. i was like this before hair loss. i didnt care for ugly people, but if i was forced to stop and think about them i'd feel pity for them

We agree.

 

[Rudiger]

It means that I expect to derive no value from engaging you. I don't expect you to deal with the ideas and to try and build toward greater understanding, I expect you to be petty and vindictive as you have been, so it's not productive.

I think I have a good idea of some of what ails you though, an accurate albeit incomplete picture. If you're open to discussing it in an adult manner, we can do so. However, I'll add that ultimately you need a professional evaluation and guidance, and that you'll have to be open-minded about it.

I'm open minded about being evaluated in whatever way you want, I doubt it's going to cut close to the bone, but I'd be impressed if it did.

I don't think even in my evaluation of you all those months ago, that it wasn't in an adult manner. Your response was not in an adult manner, so I'm going to acknowledge and then forget that, and you can write whatever you want. I don't understand how I've previously been "petty" for example, as I'm brash and abrasive, if something is on my mind, I will definitely say it.

The fact you bring up pettiness, to me, as it's been something I've called you, this is just grasping for adjectives to belittle me. Which you haven't really thought through.

If it's that serious we can continue this by PM, I've written a lot of posts that even belittle myself, and question how I think. I'm very open minded as to what you think about me, but don't think that I'm going to accept points that are false.

lol i considered disliking the post . but i stopped myself as you are reasonable haha. i agree about life not being perfect for anyone, i mean most of my friends i would consider having it easier than me, but they generally are 'depressed' too, or at least say they are. i think theyre more just bored and existential, which is a good sign imo. it shows that you want to do meaningful things and are aware. i mean as we have discussed before the movie melancholia, i wasn't even triggered by the hot depressed girl. she was more just depressed about the state of life itself rather than her own life, i understood her pain so to speak.

no one's life is perfect, but what matters is if you are secure and happy a reasonable amoiunt of time, especially to where you feel generally satisfied and have a desire to continue living. a lot of psychological studies on happiness define it as "are you satisfied with your life" rather than "are you happy". the latter is way too vague. http://worlddatabaseofhappiness.eur.nl/hap_quer/introtext_measures3.pdf

no offense but i think that "humble" mentality is just not having narcissism. being accepting of your flaws and secure in yourself.

So I admitted that being ugly is a far worse and lonely existence than being beautiful, but by saying any existence at all has it's crutches, this is Dislikeable?

Dislike all you want I don't care. If you give a reason then fine, at least we come to an understanding.

I'm trying to understand your last sentence in particular, I am in no way "humble". If I was, I'd never have brought up that I'm good looking in the first place. And nobody should be accepting of their flaws, this is what pisses me off about society. "I know what I am and I'm not changing!".

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I'm open minded about being evaluated in whatever way you want, I doubt it's going to cut close to the bone, but I'd be impressed if it did.

I don't think even in my evaluation of you all those months ago, that it wasn't in an adult manner. Your response was not in an adult manner, so I'm going to acknowledge and then forget that, and you can write whatever you want. I don't understand how I've previously been "petty" for example, as I'm brash and abrasive, if something is on my mind, I will definitely say it.

The fact you bring up pettiness, to me, as it's been something I've called you, this is just grasping for adjectives to belittle me. Which you haven't really thought through.

If it's that serious we can continue this by PM, I've written a lot of posts that even belittle myself, and question how I think. I'm very open minded as to what you think about me, but don't think that I'm going to accept points that are false.

All right, I'll PM you.

 

[Exodus2011]

So I admitted that being ugly is a far worse and lonely existence than being beautiful, but by saying any existence at all has it's crutches, this is Dislikeable?

Dislike all you want I don't care. If you give a reason then fine, at least we come to an understanding.

I'm trying to understand your last sentence in particular, I am in no way "humble". If I was, I'd never have brought up that I'm good looking in the first place. And nobody should be accepting of their flaws, this is what pisses me off about society. "I know what I am and I'm not changing!".

disliking was just my first instinct lol.

and i meant accepting of flaws you cant change, notably sh*t that us PSLers talk about like height and face.

saying you are attractive isn't necessarily bragging, if you are considered hot then you're hot. but if you bring it up just for its own sake, then yes its bragging. it was part of the conversation though so i didn't think you were bragging

 

[Rudiger]

disliking was just my first instinct lol.

and i meant accepting of flaws you cant change, notably sh*t that us PSLers talk about like height and face.

saying you are attractive isn't necessarily bragging, if you are considered hot then you're hot. but if you bring it up just for its own sake, then yes its bragging. it was part of the conversation though so i didn't think you were bragging

I can understand why that's your first instinct. I made it completely clear with "sarcastic" capitalised trigger warnings that this is not easy reading for those who are genuinely aesthetically unfortunate and I can't possibly relate to that, as much as I try.

I guess I'm just depressed lately and hate everything, being ugly, good looking, I ultimately despise all people regardless of what they are. You're OK though Exo.

 

[Exodus2011]

I can understand why that's your first instinct. I made it completely clear with "sarcastic" capitalised trigger warnings that this is not easy reading for those who are genuinely aesthetically unfortunate and I can't possibly relate to that, as much as I try.

I guess I'm just depressed lately and hate everything, being ugly, good looking, I ultimately despise all people regardless of what they are. You're OK though Exo.

maybe you should cut back on the energy drinks and coke lol.

i swear they make me LIT haha, i dont blame you for drinking them. i'd totally do stimulants again too if i wasn't anxious, i used to do adderall but that made me have my first panic attack and now i cant do stims anymore .

 

[SmoothSailing]

I ultimately despise all people regardless of what they are. You're OK though Exo.

Time for some MDMA

You will love everyone. Probably propose to exo haha.

 

[Rudiger]

maybe you should cut back on the energy drinks and coke lol.

i swear they make me LIT haha, i dont blame you for drinking them. i'd totally do stimulants again too if i wasn't anxious, i used to do adderall but that made me have my first panic attack and now i cant do stims anymore .

I rarely take coke, the last time was my forum outburst actually.

Time for some MDMA

You will love everyone. Probably propose to exo haha.

I take MDMA more often, it's probably a good suggestion as I feel in love and understanding of all beings. I took it last Friday and woke up the next day feeling that civilisation is fulfilled, we're all potentially loving human beings.

Unfortunately the MDMA realisation is not true. We are not loving human beings.

 

[SmoothSailing]

I rarely take coke, the last time was my forum outburst actually.



I take MDMA more often, it's probably a good suggestion as I feel in love and understanding of all beings. I took it last Friday and woke up the next day feeling that civilisation is fulfilled, we're all potentially loving human beings.

Unfortunately the MDMA realisation is not true. We are not loving human beings.

Also be careful not to abuse. Seriously, look up studies if you like, using more than once a month permanently effects your mood and memory (obviously not factually but our best guess with the data so far).

My MDMA (blue ghosts) days were some of my favourite times ever. I still get that feeling in my stomach when I recall coming up. I loved everyone and everything. Only LSD surpasses it in actual experience.

 

[Rudiger]

Also be careful not to abuse. Seriously, look up studies if you like, using more than once a month permanently effects your mood and memory (obviously not factually but our best guess with the data so far).

My MDMA (blue ghosts) days were some of my favourite times ever. I still get that feeling in my stomach when I recall coming up. I loved everyone and everything. Only LSD surpasses it in actual experience.

I went through a very awful phase of taking MDMA/pills constantly, like I mean most days. I really hated humanity even more than I do now, I was just on a warpath, I was acknowledging my own hatred of how everything works, and projecting this upon those who were acting similarly (which isn't un-just whatsoever).

I can't imagine the damage it's done when you're saying it affects you when taking it once a month, and I was taking it 4/5 times a week. And when I wasn't taking it, I was on harder drugs like opium to come down from it and feel normal. This lasted for a few years.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Also be careful not to abuse. Seriously, look up studies if you like, using more than once a month permanently effects your mood and memory (obviously not factually but our best guess with the data so far).

My MDMA (blue ghosts) days were some of my favourite times ever. I still get that feeling in my stomach when I recall coming up. I loved everyone and everything. Only LSD surpasses it in actual experience.

What are you doing these days? Do you believe that you're in a good place with respect to recreational drug use?

 

[blackg]

If only justice was served, always. Sadly, that's not the case in my experience while being on this earth.
Not only do individuals get away with *A LOT*, but even entire countries get away with heavy duty - sh*t on humanity sh*t.
Rich countries buy out quota for carbondioxide from poor ones, imperialists enslave (with different strategies) foreign populations,
genocides are reality all over the world, and war crimes are as common as they come. Who answers for this? - The losing/weaker part. Always.
There's no fairness and justice. The winner writes the history and chooses who gets to live on.

As for 'clinical psychopats', no they don't own a counscience.

I like how you would like it to be like this though. And I respect you for spreading the ''good word''.
Also, setting such high ethical and morale standards for yourself is admirable.
Wish more people would have that 'line of thinking' and counscience, it's just that -
today we've never been closer to a more egocentric world in which there's
really just one rule:

Survival of the fittest (good looking, IQ etc factors...you know them all I'm sure)

Cheers

I agree with most of your post but what is a "psychopat"?
A crazy New England Patriots player?

 

[SmoothSailing]

I went through a very awful phase of taking MDMA/pills constantly, like I mean most days. I really hated humanity even more than I do now, I was just on a warpath, I was acknowledging my own hatred of how everything works, and projecting this upon those who were acting similarly (which isn't un-just whatsoever).

I can't imagine the damage it's done when you're saying it affects you when taking it once a month, and I was taking it 4/5 times a week. And when I wasn't taking it, I was on harder drugs like opium to come down from it and feel normal. This lasted for a few years.

Jesus Christ dude. I did it 3 days in a row at a festival once, was having brain zaps, sleep paralysis and anxiety for weeks after. Can't imagine the damage you've done.

People go on about the dangers of cocaine heroin etc. But I really think the easiest drug to f*** up on is mdma, it's the drug I warn all my brothers about.

No more than once a month, preferably once every 3 months. After my f*** up I limit it to once a year and even at that I don't feel "the magic" anymore. Although still an amazing drug.