GeminiX
Senior Member
- Reaction score
- 5
Finally, the cure is here and I'm going to share it with you all right now!
MAGIC BEANS(tm)!
After literally nearly an hour of searching random blogs with nothing to do with hair loss whatsoever, I formulated this stunning cure for hair loss, 110% guaranteed!
Magic beans(tm) yesterday
These magic beans(tm) are so good that if you don't grow back at least 10% more hair than you had to begin with, you'll get a full refund less postage costs.
Warning, possible side effects include but are not limited to:
Spontaneous combustion;
Planned combustion;
Baldness;
Random detaching of limbs;
The sudden loss of one’s head;
Oily bowels;
Wax-like discharge from ears or ear wax disemboguement;
Snot attenuation;
Hot dog fingers;
Children born with a Golden Retriever Face;
Impotence leading to loss of male genitalia;
Hair growth on soles of feet;
Abnormal growth of nose;
Crazy itches;
Abnormally large pimples;
Full Dilation of the right pupil;
Fingernail to talon syndrome;
Brown Nose disorder;
Stinky Ears;
Melted cheese oozing from pores;
Growth of mutated organs (third yellow eye, etc.);
Obnoxious Slogans forming on arm and face;
Changes in appearance that make you resemble your own mother;
Heart reversal;
Navel discharge;
Skin failure;
Full body shrinkage;
Reincarnation;
Spontaneous combustion,
Miraculous conception;
Post-modern apathy;
Black plague;
Déjà vu;
Alien abduction;
Déjà vu;
Dry mouth;
Dry blood;
Dry eyes;
Sissyness;
Darth Vader helmet;
Loss of all emotion and assimilation into the hive mind;
Addiction;
Bad hair days;
Severe addiction;
The need to sell your body on the street to feed that addiction;
Déjà vu;
Lumbago;
Saint Vitas dance;
"Permanent winky retreat";
Faecal complexion;
Fear of clowns;
Moulting or shedding of exoskeleton;
Inbreeding;
Paedophilia;
Presbyterianism;
Inability to use spoons;
Mystic enlightenment;
Funk;
No funk;
a*** fidgeting;
Devil's haircut;
Stinkfist;
Electric head;
X-ray vision and super strength;
Demagoguery;
Piano legs;
Change in complexion;
Change in ethnicity;
Russian accent;
Déjà vu;
Entropy;
Tin ear;
Comical Jesse Helms like jowls;
Siamese twin;
Vietnam War flashbacks;
Loss of balance;
The munchies;
Crab lice;
Explosive diarrhoea;
Warp core ejection;
Explosive (literally) diarrhoea;
Evil eye;
Tendency to become verklempt.
edit: P.S. Absolutely no offence aimed at anyone, this is just for fun
MAGIC BEANS(tm)!
After literally nearly an hour of searching random blogs with nothing to do with hair loss whatsoever, I formulated this stunning cure for hair loss, 110% guaranteed!
Magic beans(tm) yesterday
These magic beans(tm) are so good that if you don't grow back at least 10% more hair than you had to begin with, you'll get a full refund less postage costs.
Warning, possible side effects include but are not limited to:
Spontaneous combustion;
Planned combustion;
Baldness;
Random detaching of limbs;
The sudden loss of one’s head;
Oily bowels;
Wax-like discharge from ears or ear wax disemboguement;
Snot attenuation;
Hot dog fingers;
Children born with a Golden Retriever Face;
Impotence leading to loss of male genitalia;
Hair growth on soles of feet;
Abnormal growth of nose;
Crazy itches;
Abnormally large pimples;
Full Dilation of the right pupil;
Fingernail to talon syndrome;
Brown Nose disorder;
Stinky Ears;
Melted cheese oozing from pores;
Growth of mutated organs (third yellow eye, etc.);
Obnoxious Slogans forming on arm and face;
Changes in appearance that make you resemble your own mother;
Heart reversal;
Navel discharge;
Skin failure;
Full body shrinkage;
Reincarnation;
Spontaneous combustion,
Miraculous conception;
Post-modern apathy;
Black plague;
Déjà vu;
Alien abduction;
Déjà vu;
Dry mouth;
Dry blood;
Dry eyes;
Sissyness;
Darth Vader helmet;
Loss of all emotion and assimilation into the hive mind;
Addiction;
Bad hair days;
Severe addiction;
The need to sell your body on the street to feed that addiction;
Déjà vu;
Lumbago;
Saint Vitas dance;
"Permanent winky retreat";
Faecal complexion;
Fear of clowns;
Moulting or shedding of exoskeleton;
Inbreeding;
Paedophilia;
Presbyterianism;
Inability to use spoons;
Mystic enlightenment;
Funk;
No funk;
a*** fidgeting;
Devil's haircut;
Stinkfist;
Electric head;
X-ray vision and super strength;
Demagoguery;
Piano legs;
Change in complexion;
Change in ethnicity;
Russian accent;
Déjà vu;
Entropy;
Tin ear;
Comical Jesse Helms like jowls;
Siamese twin;
Vietnam War flashbacks;
Loss of balance;
The munchies;
Crab lice;
Explosive diarrhoea;
Warp core ejection;
Explosive (literally) diarrhoea;
Evil eye;
Tendency to become verklempt.
edit: P.S. Absolutely no offence aimed at anyone, this is just for fun
