Thinking Of Commiting Suicide, My Thoughts

[whatevr]

@whatevr, sorry for such an 'emotional' response (I feel weird now that I posted that), I just got too used to the 'empty' cheer-ups that normal people usually give you. Wasn't ready for such an honest and straight forward reply, it really made me happier, so thanks again.

If one has never seriously contemplated ending his own life then one can definitely not empathise with those who are thinking about doing so.
Unfortunately I have been in that situation (not regarding hair), so I know how little the canned "It'll get better" bullshit means from people who don't know your situation, much less your life. Sometimes it really never gets better, and there is nothing to look forward to or hope for. That's why I wrote what I did. Only you can know if you still feel like you want to try, and believe you can find a way to be happy again. Because that's what life is ultimately about. Being happy. If you can't be happy, then why be unhappy? I believe that non-existence is preferable to pain, misery, dissatisfaction, suffering. Kind of a utilitarian view from me on that subject.

The people who give you those kinds of vapid responses have never truly been pushed to the edge. They are just talking out of their *** to make themselves feel good about having "saved" someone. The quality of your life once they dissuade you from suicide is of no concern to them afterwards.

 

[dralex]

Life's a b**ch, innit

So here's the deal, I am almost 30 now, have been loosing my hair for the past 5 years quite rapidly (I mean going from full head to nw3/4 in about 4 years and still progressing) In a diffuse thinner patter which is somehow even worse.

I am the type that looks great with hair and horrible without it (pretty big nose and a flat top of head). I used to be very fit (now I just dont care anymore) used to go out almost every night and score, now just sit in my apartment because I am ugly and life is unfair overall (hey )

Its been pretty good for me in the past.And you know what, its the contrast that kills you.
I've seen two groups of guys who can cope with it:
- the ones who weren't that good looking to begin with, and hair did almost nothing for them (sorry fellas)
- the ones who still look decent when shaved (oh the lucky ones)

I tried meds for a while, gave me nothing but eye bags and puffy nipples.

Once you go from handsome to ugly you really get a perspective on things. And its not a good one, you can try to justify things to yourself, but if you are completely honest - there is no point of denying that you have been dealt sh*t. And you would easily exchange that for things that other people call "sh*t" (god damn I would swap for your sh*t in a heartbeat!)

I don't know, is there really much point to it? Are there any ugly bald guys around to prove me wrong that life isn't just gonna suck from now on?

This is not a cry for attention, I treat my situation quite humorously now because I have been depressed for a while. I just really would like to hear from the likes of me (not good looking bald people) and if they managed to get over it.
I have found an organisation that can help one end his life with via a European euthanasia program. As I am scared of pain, not death itself, as most of us are, it seems like a pretty good option right now, what do you think?

Suicide isn't a last resort; it isn't an option at all. Sure, being ugly sucks, but there are MUCH worse off people than you. Think of people that go to war and have their face or body disfigured; or people have their bodies destroyed from some types of diseases.

I am also very depressed as a result of hair loss, and I am going through this at a much younger age. I used to go out and get drunk 3 days a week. It wasn't the pathetic type of getting drunk though; I just loved going out to clubs and bars. I would end up hooking up with a girl at least once a week (usually different girls). Over the past 2 years I have gone from no hair loss to horribly receding hairline and thinning all over (age 20-22). I have been on propecia and rogaine the entire time too, and it has done nothing. I now hate going out to clubs or bars. I no longer hook up with random girls. I wear a hat almost all the time. I always wore hats, but just much more often now.

What sucks even more, is hair was my best quality. Although I would say I am much above average looking, my hair was my best feature. I had gotten so many compliments on my hair, and even had a 3-way once because the 2 girls were so obsessed with my hair. It looked something like this:

I wouldn't even mind being bald though, because I have a pretty good face for it, BUT my head shape under my hair is super messed up. I have a very pointy elongated skull under my hair. Instead of being round on top, the two sides slant to form like a ridge in the middle. I am actually pretty sure it may be an actual skull deformity, but idk. I have never even had a buzzcut as a result of this. You can even tell it is kind of weird shaped with a hat on, but its the only way to hide my hair loss. I think my head shape would look something like this (can't tell exactly though because I have never even buzzed my hair):

I really want to shave my head, but I can't because of my messed up head shape. I don't even think about dating anymore. I am more concerned with just looking "normal".

So yeah it sucks sooo f***n bad, but life moves on. Everyday I think about my hair, but there are still good things in life. I still really enjoy weight lifting and work out all the time now. I am now focused to get my BF% to around 8% (at 12% atm), while keeping my bench press at 315lbs and squat at 405lbs, and pullups at 25+. I am focusing super hard on school to ensure I get a high paying job. I do some service to give back to the community. And I actually still look way better than most people with a hat on or even with my screwed up hairline and thinning (Doubt I would bald though as a result of the messed up head shape). I still have a great loving family, and have great friends, even though I am turning more into a hermit as a result of hair loss. Sure, I think about my hair loss everyday, almost all day, but I also realize there is so much to live for, that suicide really isn't an option.

 

[shookwun]

Suicide isn't a last resort; it isn't an option at all. Sure, being ugly sucks, but there are MUCH worse off people than you. Think of people that go to war and have their face or body disfigured; or people have their bodies destroyed from some types of diseases.

I am also very depressed as a result of hair loss, and I am going through this at a much younger age. I used to go out and get drunk 3 days a week. It wasn't the pathetic type of getting drunk though; I just loved going out to clubs and bars. I would end up hooking up with a girl at least once a week (usually different girls). Over the past 2 years I have gone from no hair loss to horribly receding hairline and thinning all over (age 20-22). I have been on propecia and rogaine the entire time too, and it has done nothing. I now hate going out to clubs or bars. I no longer hook up with random girls. I wear a hat almost all the time. I always wore hats, but just much more often now.

What sucks even more, is hair was my best quality. Although I would say I am much above average looking, my hair was my best feature. I had gotten so many compliments on my hair, and even had a 3-way once because the 2 girls were so obsessed with my hair. It looked something like this:

I wouldn't even mind being bald though, because I have a pretty good face for it, BUT my head shape under my hair is super messed up. I have a very pointy elongated skull under my hair. Instead of being round on top, the two sides slant to form like a ridge in the middle. I am actually pretty sure it may be an actual skull deformity, but idk. I have never even had a buzzcut as a result of this. You can even tell it is kind of weird shaped with a hat on, but its the only way to hide my hair loss. I think my head shape would look something like this (can't tell exactly though because I have never even buzzed my hair):

I really want to shave my head, but I can't because of my messed up head shape. I don't even think about dating anymore. I am more concerned with just looking "normal".

So yeah it sucks sooo f***n bad, but life moves on. Everyday I think about my hair, but there are still good things in life. I still really enjoy weight lifting and work out all the time now. I am now focused to get my BF% to around 8% (at 12% atm), while keeping my bench press at 315lbs and squat at 405lbs, and pullups at 25+. I am focusing super hard on school to ensure I get a high paying job. I do some service to give back to the community. And I actually still look way better than most people with a hat on or even with my screwed up hairline and thinning (Doubt I would bald though as a result of the messed up head shape). I still have a great loving family, and have great friends, even though I am turning more into a hermit as a result of hair loss. Sure, I think about my hair loss everyday, almost all day, but I also realize there is so much to live for, that suicide really isn't an option.

can you post your hair?

 

[chrisis]

Sometimes it really never gets better, and there is nothing to look forward to or hope for. That's why I wrote what I did.

Sometimes it does get better. http://metro.co.uk/2014/01/14/man-t...ing-suicide-in-finding-mike-campaign-4262459/

The fact is you know very little about this guy and you're recommending he kill himself.

If someone is considering suicide, they should speak to a medical professional, not to someone on a forum egging him on.

 

[whatevr]

Sometimes it does get better. http://metro.co.uk/2014/01/14/man-t...ing-suicide-in-finding-mike-campaign-4262459/

The fact is you know very little about this guy and you're recommending he kill himself.

Don't be stupid. Where did I tell him to kill himself?

Don't you see how much it means to a man in his position to hear something different than the standard "You have so much to live for, it'll get better"? How much it means to hear from someone who actually understands being in that mindset? Someone who has been in his position, and who knows how that kind of vapid crap is wholly unhelpful, even demeaning to the person's situation!

I never told him to kill himself, I told him to consider all options that could help him and ask himself if he's really done everything he can, and that if he feels he has, then I hope he can find a peaceful way out of his suffering. Meanwhile you're telling him it'll get better without knowing his situation either. There's the hypocrisy.

Your problem is as with the majority of the population - you don't understand, you've never been cornered or faced the situation where every path you take is a dead end. For you, suicide is never an acceptable solution. You would rather keep a person alive through hell and back, no matter what. Life has no inherent value if the person cannot derive anything positive from it.

 

[chrisis]

Suicidal people are vulnerable. By indulging in his suicidal fantasy, you are telling him to kill himself. The problem with your "advice" is that you don't understand his situation. You have no idea how he will react to your careless words.

 

[whatevr]

Suicidal people are vulnerable. By indulging in his suicidal fantasy, you are telling him to kill himself. The problem with your "advice" is that you don't understand his situation. You have no idea how he will react to your careless words.

And the problem with yours is that you don't understand anyone's. I was in his position, I posted about what I was going through on a place that wasn't filled with bullshit empty advice. I got a similar kind of reply to what I'm giving him here. It actually made me far more peaceful. I had it all planned out, the whole way out, where I was going to buy the sh*t, everything. But they helped me by understanding, not by telling me that it will get better. Even just the way everyone non-chalantly talked about all the methods of suicide made me realise how asinine the whole thing is, but then it was so calming to know that there is always a way out when I wouldn't be able to handle things anymore, and that I could take it any time.

In the end, the universe had a different plan for me. I found something that gave me temporary relief, and have been fighting ever since. Here I am, 2 years later. Still not cured, still knee deep in the sh*t, but fighting, because I was given a fighting chance. (This is not about hair loss)

That's my situation though. Some people are never given that chance, and it's just sh*t all the way through. You have to realize that as well. What suicidal people need more than generic empty pep talk, is someone who understands their situation and who can empathize with them. Someone who can say "I've been there." What is more motivating than seeing someone who has gone through the same sh*t as you are and come out the other way? If anything gives them a will to live, that would be it.

 

[chrisis]

So you got a similar sort of reply to him and didn't go ahead with it. What if it's different this time? How well do you know him and psychological condition and emotional wellbeing?

Let's remind ourselves what you wrote:

Once you get to that point where life is far more of a pain than a pleasure, what good reason is there to keep enduring that pain?

That point is different for everyone. Only you can know when you've reached it.

If you truly feel like there's nothing that can help you anymore, then the only thing I can say is that I wish you a painless way out and hope you find peace in the afterlife (or lack of).

How can someone who is depressed evaluate "pain" objectively? They can't. What he needs is proper help, not you being his suicidal cheerleader.

I'm done here and want the conversation to go back to addressing @sals.

 

[Admin]

If I ever got to the point where "everything was a dead end" because of my appearance? I would simply start taking steroids and take all the focus away from my face and head. I would be responsible about it, and educate myself on the damage done by taking them wrong, and the safest ways to do it, but rather than die, I would become a *beast* .

Think about all the guys who have incredibly hot girls because they are beasts, and then picture that same guy skinny - with that face. 80% of the guys who are beasts are beasts because they are ugly as hell. And when they get big, nobody cares. People only notice the incredible body and masculinity. Women are very attracted to that.

So instead of suicide, I would simply get jacked as hell. And do my best not to damage my organs with illegal steroids, but accomplish the goal as responsibly as possible. If the alternative is being dead, then why wouldn't you just go this route instead?

99% chance of being desired by women again, even if you're ugly as hell.

 

[JHCL1990]

If I ever got to the point where "everything was a dead end" because of my appearance? I would simply start taking steroids and take all the focus away from my face and head. I would be responsible about it, and educate myself on the damage done by taking them wrong, and the safest ways to do it, but rather than die, I would become a *beast* .

Think about all the guys who have incredibly hot girls because they are beasts, and then picture that same guy skinny - with that face. 80% of the guys who are beasts are beasts because they are ugly as hell. And when they get big, nobody cares. People only notice the incredible body and masculinity. Women are very attracted to that.

So instead of suicide, I would simply get jacked as hell. And do my best not to damage my organs with illegal steroids, but accomplish the goal as responsibly as possible. If the alternative is being dead, then why wouldn't you just go this route instead?

99% chance of being desired by women again, even if you're ugly as hell.

This is the same way I think. Hell, the only reason I'm not on roids now (even though bodybuilding is my passion and my skinny genetics hold me back) is because I don't want to lose my hair. If I had tried everything and still lost my hair, I'd go to my gym buddy and tell him I want to do a cycle.

 

[Admin]

And there are ways to get jacked without killing your liver or causing other problems. I don't claim to be an expert, but I have a friend who just boosts his testosterone a bit, and he's massive. He works out a lot, but when your testosterone is a little higher, you have quick recovery and working out can be really really enjoyable. Not torture.

He doesn't do all the illegal stuff. I think he just boosts himself from the average - what - 600 to like 800 or 900, and then works out hard. Very conservative approach. He actually hasn't lost his hair though he's receded quite a bit, and the guy is not very good looking. But he's massive and he has multiple girls begging for his attention. Especially on the dating sites.

But yeah - view it as either/or. I always have. I always knew if the hair thing didn't pan out for me, I would shave it and just get massive.

To be completely honest, you'd get a lot more girls being big than you will having "pretty hair" ....

 

[buckthorn]

If I ever got to the point where "everything was a dead end" because of my appearance? I would simply start taking steroids and take all the focus away from my face and head. .

Steroids for a man that is seriously suicidal? Sounds like a death sentence to me.

 

[JHCL1990]

Steroids for a man that is seriously suicidal? Sounds like a death sentence to me.

No. He'd probably feel 1000x better than he does now on a proper, safe cycle. How he's feeling now is due to a hormonal imbalance. That's why humans "feel" anything--due to our fluctuating hormones and chemical imbalances in the brain. Why do you think there are drugs for depression? This is also why some people suffer depression on hairloss meds--because they mess with your hormones. A lot of guys on steroids have a greater sense of well being.

 

[Zoro]

If I ever got to the point where "everything was a dead end" because of my appearance? I would simply start taking steroids and take all the focus away from my face and head. I would be responsible about it, and educate myself on the damage done by taking them wrong, and the safest ways to do it, but rather than die, I would become a *beast* .

Think about all the guys who have incredibly hot girls because they are beasts, and then picture that same guy skinny - with that face. 80% of the guys who are beasts are beasts because they are ugly as hell. And when they get big, nobody cares. People only notice the incredible body and masculinity. Women are very attracted to that.

So instead of suicide, I would simply get jacked as hell. And do my best not to damage my organs with illegal steroids, but accomplish the goal as responsibly as possible. If the alternative is being dead, then why wouldn't you just go this route instead?

99% chance of being desired by women again, even if you're ugly as hell.

This, as a last resort if nothing ends up working I'll probably hop on some anabolics and do an fue+smp and be done with it (actually, the only thing keeping me from running even a mild test only cycle is this damn disease.). For me at least, having long hair on top to add length to my head/face is desperately what I want, but I think I could cope with fue+smp

I would say don't kill yourself. its not worth it etc. but if you want to truly kill yourself, I don't think anything we say to you is going to stop you. But whatever decision your make, spend a long time thinking about it, weighing the pros and the cons, and compare them with alternative choices (like Admin's idea).

 

[tellersquill]

Lets just not get a bobster situation where people troll or encourage him.

I agree with suicide but only in extreme cases and I believe euthanasia should take over. If you have dementia or ALS then it is certainly fine. Most mental illnesses can, however, be overcome with time and treatment

 

[shookwun]

And there are ways to get jacked without killing your liver or causing other problems. I don't claim to be an expert, but I have a friend who just boosts his testosterone a bit, and he's massive. He works out a lot, but when your testosterone is a little higher, you have quick recovery and working out can be really really enjoyable. Not torture.

He doesn't do all the illegal stuff. I think he just boosts himself from the average - what - 600 to like 800 or 900, and then works out hard. Very conservative approach. He actually hasn't lost his hair though he's receded quite a bit, and the guy is not very good looking. But he's massive and he has multiple girls begging for his attention. Especially on the dating sites.

But yeah - view it as either/or. I always have. I always knew if the hair thing didn't pan out for me, I would shave it and just get massive.

To be completely honest, you'd get a lot more girls being big than you will having "pretty hair" ....

If you have the mental, and physical endurance, you could always wear a hair piece. it can be a viable option, but for many including myself it was more agony then reward.

As far as steroids, the key is to get as big as you can on the least amount possible. 250-300MG a week for a couple years straight, and you will go from a skinny wimp to a fairly big, muscular and dense guy. When you come off, your body will be able to hold most of your gains, but at this point you will probably be on TRT anyway.

 

[Admin]

And I realize its a "nono" to recommend steroids. You need to be VERY SURE you know what you're doing. I would encourage reading the various forums on the topic for a minimum of a month or two before you even consider doing anything. There is a huge amount of important knowledge to gain before doing anything like this.

I guess my point was, if the only other alternative was the coffin, this is what I would do instead. I believe it can be done safely, but you need to be very very informed, and almost OCD about it so that you don't hurt yourself.

I think the biggest takeaway from this is the statement that a lot of really built guys are ugly as sin, and that's exactly why they got big instead. Having "pretty hair" does not make women want you. Its purely for us, most of the time, because we know we'd look horrible without hair. Women like masculinity in my experience, (not over the top gross/jacked but regular athletic masculinity) and having hair is a plus, but totally secondary to masculinity.

 

[FootyStar]

Life's a b**ch, innit

So here's the deal, I am almost 30 now, have been loosing my hair for the past 5 years quite rapidly (I mean going from full head to nw3/4 in about 4 years and still progressing) In a diffuse thinner patter which is somehow even worse.

I am the type that looks great with hair and horrible without it (pretty big nose and a flat top of head). I used to be very fit (now I just dont care anymore) used to go out almost every night and score, now just sit in my apartment because I am ugly and life is unfair overall (hey )

Its been pretty good for me in the past.And you know what, its the contrast that kills you.
I've seen two groups of guys who can cope with it:
- the ones who weren't that good looking to begin with, and hair did almost nothing for them (sorry fellas)
- the ones who still look decent when shaved (oh the lucky ones)

I tried meds for a while, gave me nothing but eye bags and puffy nipples.

Once you go from handsome to ugly you really get a perspective on things. And its not a good one, you can try to justify things to yourself, but if you are completely honest - there is no point of denying that you have been dealt sh*t. And you would easily exchange that for things that other people call "sh*t" (god damn I would swap for your sh*t in a heartbeat!)

I don't know, is there really much point to it? Are there any ugly bald guys around to prove me wrong that life isn't just gonna suck from now on?

This is not a cry for attention, I treat my situation quite humorously now because I have been depressed for a while. I just really would like to hear from the likes of me (not good looking bald people) and if they managed to get over it.
I have found an organisation that can help one end his life with via a European euthanasia program. As I am scared of pain, not death itself, as most of us are, it seems like a pretty good option right now, what do you think?

Sals, I can relate to a lot of what you're saying. I am in my very late 20's too and I've been completely bald and contemplating suicide constantly for the past five or six years as well. It's like being stuck in a black hole of despair.

Why not stick around to see what the new treatments will bring us in the future? I know I don't want to miss the day when this horrible disease is finally cured.

Getting man on Mars? Screw that, getting hairs back on one's head is far more exciting!

 

[shookwun]

Sals, I can relate to a lot of what you're saying. I am in my very late 20's too and I've been completely bald and contemplating suicide constantly for the past five or six years as well. It's like being stuck in a black hole of despair.

Why not stick around to see what the new treatments will bring us in the future? I know I don't want to miss the day when this horrible disease is finally cured.

Getting man on Mars? Screw that, getting hairs back on one's head is far more exciting!

why dont you try a piece? it's not for everyone, but if you're bald then you have nothing to loose/.

 

[FootyStar]

why dont you try a piece? it's not for everyone, but if you're bald then you have nothing to loose/.

Yeah, I've been comtemplating it. The only reason I haven't gone for it is because I have no hair on my head at all and would need a full cap to do the job.

The maintenance and discomfort for those things is pretty high from what I hear.