Are Hair Loss Journeys Nothing More Than Contrived Cis-Male Whining?
I think that many of us feel somewhat guilty for caring so much about hair loss. Our grandfathers were working in steel mills and coal mines and they didn't have the bandwidth to address hair loss nor were there any medications until late in the 20th century. Of course, it would be trite to over-analyze this aspect but men were men and females were female and rarely the twain did meet.
Now we have two reliable medications that cause little to no feminization and which are highly efficacious. For over 80 percent of us, particularly younger guys, finasteride and Duta can stop hair loss cold. But the guilt is palpable among the male balding cohort for even using these. You might miss an erection or two or your fertility might be temporarily affected or not only that. Morning wood complaints are numerous and these guys seem to be actively looking for sides.
Most notice no feminization artifacts ever nor do they ever experience sides and yet, XY's remain conflicted about reductase inhibitors and many males actively attempt to dissuade others from using them. Many of the "stories" on Tressless are shamelessly contrived, not to mention apparently written by guys who can neither read nor scroll because they ask the same vapid questions again and again and they already know the answers.
I am going to make a list of best questions on Tressless to kid those less fortunate than I. Humor about others is a big thing now online I have noticed. When Covid-19 commenced, I started looking for things to do and I am smart and good at separating the wheat from the chaff.
But something very common to lawyers and therapists soon began. I began to dislike my clients just as had happened to me earlier in life as a criminal defense lawyer.
I started to get fed up at "volunteering" my time and began somewhat mocking the very people that I sought to help. I then moved to the trans sites and every Goddess-damned question is about breast growth. The level of discourse on such sites is often poor and people get their feelings hurt easily which is also tiresome. They also cling to whatever notions they want to cling to, regardless of the evidence and data and somehow become invested in their HRT and baldness protocols.
An online friend balding since 15, recommended this thread and I became easily enthralled but also annoyed because there was no way to scroll and literally one had to click, where are we now, 600 times to consume the entire thread. I usually petered out around page 15 and then would start over. Now I know how to enter a particular page number but we still can't scroll over impertinent comments.
@bridgeburn had found a marketing technique by starting this thread which resulted in his both restoring his hairline and getting acclaim here for doing so. It began as sort of a 95 theses related to hair restoration and as he commented in serial form, it was easy to get really interested in what he was doing in the cis-male context. Obviously, trans MtFs had been using these meds for 70 years with little interest until Cait Jenner came out.
Every single thing that Mr. Bridgeburn tried worked for him. He shifted AA's frequently and they all worked for him and I don't remember his ever mentioning unwanted sides. Unlike everyone else virtually, he never had sheds. Oral minoxidil? No sides there either even though many report significant unwanted hair growth. He did mention his arms getting hairy. I had my arms "done" on Friday in 20 minutes for $125 so the excess hair issue is probably not a reason to not try oral minoxidil. I gained 20 pounds immediately in about two weeks and now I have gotten 8 or so pounds to drop off in a couple of days so oral minoxidil might play havoc with body weight but of course, that stabilizes.
Back to Mr. Bridgeburn. It became obvious early on that he was going to succeed in his hair quest and the fact that he had rock star long curls was intriguing.
"You can't recapture the past". But maybe we can.
The disappointment seemed palpable however when he announced significant breast growth which all of you had predicted even though I continue harping on the fact that significant breast growth only occurs in fewer than 20 percent of MtFs and over half have breasts sized AA or less and on a broad male frame, AA's are inconsequential. Cup size, here, not the meds.
Many, if not most MtFs get breast augmentation (over 50 percent). They struggle with breast growth and become obsessed with it in exactly the same way that many of us do with male pattern baldness. Rube Goldberg-esque protocols are often employed and MtFs set alarm clocks to ring in the middle of the night to ensure the half-lives of their meds remain steady, lest their breasts recoil or fail to begin or get "stalled" which is an MtF euphemism for that's all folks, in terms of developing more breast tissue.
We have breast data going back decades and no one's boobs are getting any better or bigger non-surgically in the MtF community.
In the cis-male context, many purported hair loss gurus had enormous, "stick to the wall stacks" that they had no idea about in terms of synergy. Cis-males love to tinker. Complexity is often sought. If restoring hair loss or growing breasts was easy, then everyone would do it and where's the fun in that? Everyone waited breathlessly for Mr. Bridgeburn to schedule his gyno (guy-no!) removal when he announced that he had no intention to do so, ever. In fact, he liked them!
Probably the thread declined at this point since
@bridgeburn had done nothing more than what thousands of MtFs do every day.
We know that hair restoration is possible for MtFs but only at the price of random-sized boobs so that doesn't bother balding cis-males too much. But in a male-context, MtFs are cheating to restore their hair so eh. What helps to bring the two groups together is restoring a full head of hair is hard and many MtFs never experience significant hair regrowth. There are no statistics to my knowledge but it is clear that breasts are the MtF obsession, not hair and hair protocols are rarely discussed on the reddit sites. Like many folks with great hair (all?) breast growth came easily to me and it was unnervingly, in a good way, similar to a teenage girl in how extended and thorough the process was. It's easy to grow boobs when one isn't trying, though and I never tried, Goddess knows.
So, honestly, Mr. Bridgeburn failed in his quest in terms of his stated intentions and he didn't
cross back over, which remains the Holy Grail of using HRT to restore a full head of hair. Not only that, in my view, his facial "results" as an MtF were exceptional and he began to look less and less male. I got impatient in my own situation and I sought tweaks that were non-surgical in nature but he wasn't trying to pass. Generally, with MtFs from what I have viewed, the phrase "garbage in, garbage out" reigns. Good looking males say between 5' 5" and 5' 10" usually improve their looks in terms of Greek ideals and less attractive males, less so. That's another reason that I enjoy the MtF full head of hair pics, before and after.
Passing is no longer the goal. Instead, passing with style and panache became my quest. Merely passing is for the less refined. I remain a snob. I sought to become more attractive in a non-binary context, meaning becoming more attractive in a male context and also in a female context. My wife remained unimpressed though so I proselytize only for people to do "this" as safely and as sensibly as possible while retaining "reasonable expectations". I am vain and prideful enough to believe that I have found better ways but none of this relates to HRT, which remains a hit and miss process for pretty much everybody. What we are trying to do as males in a caucasian context is hard, and close to impossible throughout history.
I recommend that individuals change their expectations from merely restoration and rather towards becoming more attractive males. This is another bugaboo but I no longer care and I freely analyze male "beauty" and there is nothing to feel guilty about trying to do so. The focus changes however and hair loss becomes just part of the mix of things that make any cis-male attractive.
@bridgeburn became adorable but in the cis-male world, no one wanted anything but his hair since he looked young and girlish (in a good way, lol). It is very strange analyzing someone that I have never met or interacted with and I continue to view him as a pioneer and nothing that I say should be viewed as derogatory but as he stated, "he had hair and a life and was ready to move on".
It was one of the coolest send-offs ever even though he backslid and would comment from time to time but the fact is that he didn't finish the process.
Even the MtFs who posted and who were out were suffering from serious sheds and I became concerned about all of the medication switching. FtMs only use T or maybe DHT on their organs but they don't sit around conjecturing.
They closed the DIY FtM reddit site and I think that I know why. Aside from the legal issues with procuring T which is a highly regulated medication, their sites were boring and there was little to discuss and the "men" on these sites would put up transition pics and ask for feedback and then whine to the moderators if someone said that they were eh as a male or Goddess-forbid, beginning to bald. I am not politically correct and I know that being trans allows me to make certain observations that others cannot but to me, eh, FtM sites are full of cis-females who continue to have the ethic of cis-females and eh, that's probably all that I should say.
But their "results" are rarely refined and often easily clockable, which given that most of them are under 170 cm's and petite in breadth isn't hard to do. Last time that I looked they were discussing why peeing standing up was so much better than squatting or using a funnel on camping trips, which is mindless and to me, embarrassing.
As my digression continues--I gained an hour today!
And nope, sorry, the beards don't look authentic or impressive and the neck to toe body hair is not something that MtFs find endearing or really even understand. I know no cis-males who seek to become head to toe bears and most would consider this gross--note that male body builders don't do this but almost every pic on the more revelatory sites show FtM men with incredible body hair coverage, anus included, sigh, and it still doesn't look cis-male-like.
It looks contrived and hyper-male and MtFs have their own issues with seeking hyper-femininity related to tits and nipple size and *** size and even bimbofication so it can become just as zany and unrealistic for people purporting to try to pass; instead, inside the goal becomes to become hyper-specimens of the opposite sex. It is often poorly thought out and based on stereotypes and it makes me feel uneasy every single time. To me, chest binding by anyone is antiquated and if a certain goal requires binding then all of us should run in the opposite direction. FtMs sit around discussing which binders work best which simply makes me shudder. They love pics where they make disparaging "remarks" with their hands or fingers or where they hold their crotch which is not something I ever did and certainly not in a picture posted on the internet.
I recently encountered one guy who in my view, had just destroyed his looks to the point of annihilation by using testosterone and he was perfectly happy in his new life, growing his new dick out of his arm, apparently. I stopped following this person because I found him horrendously ugly and scarred and just three years earlier, this had been a very pretty girl. I am not against it and I am not against breast removal but it does mar one's body and it leave horrendous scars so just telling people to get surgery is not cognizant of what a difficult decision breast removal should be.
Back to the corset or worse, which is not very "male" or female at all. I would never recommend a binder to anyone following my path. Breast growth is a possibility. Man up and take what you get but hiding them by binding them in shame is no way to increase self-esteem.
Goddess bless. I am libertarian but many trans folks have to get off the high horse of superiority and be more "normal".
MtFs and cis-males using hormones have the possibility of greatly increasing their attractiveness as males,
per se and I encourage a more global goal, including not seeking the ability to wear their hair long. That just ain't gonna happen for any cis-males who eschew copious amounts of estrogen, which of course makes them infertile and susceptible to looking less attractive depending upon what they use as factors in being attractive, i.e., male face but not too male or squarish, being tall, lean, muscular, broad, maybe expert in copulation ability and size, income, etc. as these are things that cis-females look for when considering mating.
@bridgeburn and I are both petite in height, size and breadth and those to me are the most important factors in achieving one's goals in an MtF context but of course, MtFs whine about the unfairness of petite folks passing more easily to which I say, yes, it is unfair but ask the Goddess why, not me.
Even worse are the MtFs, who are usually over 190 cm denying that their height in any way makes them less likely to pass. "It's all about how you handle yourself", they say, which is major BS when a person has a booming voice and broad shoulders and a square neck and head. Of course, anyone over 190 cm is unlikely to pass in public but one tends to get shouted down for telling the simple truth. Being MtF, outside of puberty blocker context is incredibly influenced by size factors and many of the younger non-puberty blocker gals are desperate to stop growing taller so just like anti-finasteride types, in come the "helpful" people telling them that size doesn't matter and making them feel guilty for trying to use HRT so that they don't pass 190 cm. Sigh.
For cis-males, however:
Pretty faces, and long curls, not so much and certainly not D cups bouncing about everywhere. White males have beards almost invariably and using facial hair is perhaps the best means aside from scalp hair styling to perfect one's look. I liked the lean, narrow-faced three day stubble look until expanding dermatitis ruined even that for me. Now I lack facial follicles pretty much entirely and that was not an easy decision to make because there is no way back, which is another hormonal theme that fascinates and scares cis-folks in terms of regret stories: "I cut off my penis and now it sucks when I go camping". MtFs actually do not cut off their penises if receiving SRS but that is the public perception.
We can all unite to try to find a solution to the shedding issue, though. That shouldn't be happening so frequently but then again, hormones are not toys; they are powerful and have to be used with respect for what they can do.
To me, this thread was and is a great idea and we deal with some of the most arcane issues in endocrinology. But it was incomplete and only one person, Mr. Bridgeburn grew cosmetically significant hair with the ability to achieve female-like locks. The rest of the guys and some gals, got bogged down and people began constantly writing about shedding and switching meds, which rang a bell since MtFs switch meds at a dime, myself included, perhaps, once, and it often indicates a type of sickness psychologically. There is only so much that can be micro-managed in life and what worked for the founder of the thread seemed highly difficult to replicate. Noah met and knows him; I am certain that he did in fact have great hair results but where does that leave the rest of us?
