Everything you've said is social stuff assigned to the socially assigned gender. There are many cis women with a lot of hair, or deep voices, or very tall, or very masculine. And because of that they are less of a woman? Not all women are polite, fine, and Disney princesses. Although it's true that I try to fit in, to go unnoticed, to be silent, polite, and feminine, I suppose because of the references and exposure I've always had, but if it weren't like that there would be nothing wrong with it, there are women and men of all types just as there are feminine men, who have soft voices, or who use e2, that doesn't make them less of a man. It's just social stuff.